The First Year
by abiholmes97
Summary: Follows Anthony Holmes in the first year of his life. Dedicated to my Goddaughter Phoebe Grace and Baby Tot. Also dedicated to my Aunty Karen who is the closest thing I have to a mother. She is amazing and I love her so much. Also dedicated to my two sisters Ella and Anya- they are my world, my joy and my life. They are amazing people and I wish them every success in life.
1. December

**Chapter One- December**

December came quickly after November. Anthony was doing well. By the time December was here he was four days old. His eyes were opening and he was looking up at us all the time now. He had deep brown round eyes like my fathers. He was eating and sleeping regualry and we were used to the 2am and 6am feeds. Daniel was the best father in the world. He would walk around the house with Anthony along one arm and a cup of coffee or something in the other. He would lie on the floor of the living room and play with him.

On the 6th December we put our Christmas tree up. I put Anthony in his Moses basket and he gurgled a bit but nodded off. I put some Christmas tunes on quietly in the background and began to decorate the tree. Daniel came in a few minutes later with the box of decorations. I had already done most of the tinsel. He came over and helped me to reach the top. He then reached and pulled the box of decorations over. We started to put baubles and little hanging decorations on. Some of them, we had made whilst being in primary school and were starting to fall apart. Two of them, had come all the way from Berlin when we went over on a sixth form trip. I smiled as I looked at them.

"We'll have to take Anthony to Berlin one Christmas when he's older." I said.

Daniel smiled, "I agree. Just so long as I don't have to work!" I laughed, remembering that Daniel was often over there on work.

"You won't have to work." I said, "It'll be a nice family holiday."

Daniel nodded, "Sounds like fun." He said, talking another decoration out. It was a bauble that had been painted by Phoebe Lestrade when she was 2. "Do you remember when Phoebe made these?"

I nodded, "It was our first Christmas together and the Baker Street Christmas tree had 3 of them on its branches because we all lived under one roof."

"And this year, we'll all be under one roof again." He said, hanging some more baubles on.

"Don't forget the back." I said quickly before adding, "Yes, even if it is Chichester, it'll be good to be with everyone."

We finished putting on the decorations and Daniel put the lights round the tree. I went over to the Moses basket and got Anthony out. Daniel got the star out of its box and gave it to me. Together, as a family, we put the star on top of the tree. Later that afternoon, as I was feeding Anthony, Daniel went and put the lights up outside the house. I couldn't get Anthony to wind so we wondered around the house.

"You know," I said to him softly, "Christmas is a very special time of year. You won't understand just now but in a few years you will." I looked down at him. He was looking up at me with his big brown eyes and refusing to burp! I sighed, "Two thousand years ago," I continued, heading upstairs, "A baby was born. A very special baby. A baby who would grow up to save us all. He wasn't born in a palace or a castle, just a stable with all the animals. His mum and dad loved him so much and cared for him until he was all grown up and they loved him until he died." I was walking into his nursery. "You are _my_ special baby and _I_ will love you forever and ever…" but then Anthony burped. I laughed softly, "Of course you would choose then to burp."

Just then, the doorbell rang. I sighed.

"I think your dad has locked himself out!" and I walked back downstairs again. Sure enough, Dan had locked himself out of the house and was looking through the glass at me. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Don't laugh at me Abigail Holmes." He said, smiling.

"Sorry. I couldn't help it." I said, stroking his face. "You can be so stupid sometimes."

He smiled at me, "I know. But you love me."

"Of course I do." And I kissed him softly.

3 weeks later, we had packed the car up with presents and clothes. Daniel was driving. Anthony was in his little car seat in the front, I was in the back and we were on our way to Chichester to be with everyone for Christmas. John, Mary, Amber and Joseph were on their way down on Christmas Eve and Sherlock, Molly and Hamish were there now along with Mycroft, Greg, Phoebe and Rory. Wanda and Timothy were coming down the day after us. It was a cold and grey day and the weather reports had been threatening snow. But we made it down to Chichester without too much trouble. We stopped once so that I could feed and change Anthony.

Upon arriving in Chichester, I was almost bowled over by my brother as he came racing out the front door.

"Careful Hamish!" called Molly, running after her son.

"It's ok, mum!" I called back. I patted him on the head and hugged him. "It's good to see you, kid."

"It's good to see you too!" he said, then he peered in through the car window, "Can I see Anthony?" he asked.

I chuckled, "Let's get him inside first."

Hamish immediately ran back inside. I got the baby seat out of the car and Dan got our bags. We could get the presents later. On my way in, I hugged and kissed Molly. She led the way into the living room where a roaring fire was lit in the hearth and everyone was gathered there. Sherlock got up and took the baby carrier off of me and placed it down. Phoebe and Hamish immediately went over and had a look. Rory crawled over to see what the fuss was about.

Anthony began to gristle. "Guys," I said to my brother and goddaughter. "Give him some space. There's a lot more people than he is used to and he just needs time to adjust."

Lestrade went and picked up Rory whilst Phoebe plodded off to do her puzzles. Hamish backed away a little bit. I went and sat by him.

"I promise you can have first cuddles," I whispered to him, "So just give him some space." Hamish nodded excitedly and went to wind up Mycroft.

We spent a lovely day as a family, talking and chatting. Anthony got bounced around a lot but once he had acclimatised he was fine. The next few days in the lead up to Christmas were manic and Daniel wouldn't let me help. So I spent a lot of time with Molly and the kids. I didn't mind. Hamish just wanted to hold his nephew so I let him and played with Phoebe and Rory. Phoebe was very independent as a 4 year old and Rory sat in my lap as we played puzzles.

Then it was Christmas Eve. Mary, John, Amber and Joseph arrived in the afternoon. We had lunch and then went for a walk. When we were out walking, it began to snow. I tucked Anthony up in his pram (Daniel was pushing him) and put my hand trough Daniel's. Soon, the snow got too heavy and we headed back to the house. Daniel, Lestrade and Sherlock went to make hot cocoa for everyone whilst I headed upstairs to feed Anthony. Molly and Mary came with me. I sat in the rocking chair in Rory's nursery and began to feed my son.

"Is he a good feeder?" asked Mary.

I nodded. "Usually. Sometimes it's harder at two in the morning so he usually has a bottle then."

"Yeah, we found that the early morning feeds were easiest with a bottle." She agreed.

"Also, it allows for Daniel to be able to feed him. He does the two o clock feed unless he's at work and I'm able to sleep."

"That's nice of him." Said Molly quietly. "Sherlock was like that with Hamish and Elizabeth. It was helpful when there were the two of them."

I smiled kindly at her. "Sherlock surprised everyone as a father." I said, "And Greg said that Mycroft is quite hands on with Rory and Phoebe."

"Who would have thought it," said Mary, surprised, "That the Holmes' Brother's would be such good fathers?"

"I'll admit, I was surprised when Sherlock said he wanted to have children." Said Molly, "And now he wants another one."

"Oh mum," I said rocking back and forth in the chair, "That's wonderful news!"

"Yeah," said Mary, "It'll be really good for you."

"Will it?" she said, "I don't know if I'm ready yet."

"Mum," I said, "It's been 7 years since Eliza died. I think you're ready and I think that this could help you."

She nodded, "You're right." She smiled, "I'm being silly."

I smiled, "No you're not, you're grieving and that can take a long time, trust me I know. You've got to move on when you're ready to move on. No one can make you or force you. It's a personal thing. Only you know when you are ready and now you are."

Molly just looked at me. "I forgot you lost your parents."

I laughed, "Lucky you could forget." I smiled, "Nah, its ok. I moved on. It's ancient history now. I have a new history to forge." I looked down at Anthony and smiled. Never in a million years would I have imagined that I would be a mum to a wonderful little boy with an amazing husband. I had been so incredibly lucky. The sad and lonely orphan was now a mum, wife, daughter, sister and godmother. If I had told my 7 year old self what my life was going to become I wouldn't have believed myself.

Christmas Day dawned sunny and snowy. The snow that had started that afternoon, had got heavier overnight and had settled. It looked as though someone had iced the entire grounds. I was up at 3 that morning and after settling Anthony back down, I went and watched the snow swirl and fall past the window. I then got back into bed and curled into Daniel who hadn't stirred at all.

I had woken up because Anthony wanted his feed and I was awake anyway. Now, my sleeping husband was about to wake up and Christmas would begin. I wondered out of the room and was immediately ambushed by Hamish Holmes.

"Happy Christmas Abi!" He said loudly. I put my fingers to my lips, looking around, hoping no one had woken up. "Oh, it's ok." He said, "Mum and Dad are up, so are Uncle John and Aunty Mary. And I believe Uncle Myc and Uncle Greg are awake too."

I smiled, "It's Christmas Day. Of course everyone's up."

A door opened along the hallway. Sherlock Holmes stepped out. He was wearing checkered bottoms and a plain khaki coloured top with his 'famous' blue dressing gown.

"Morning Dad." I said cheerfully.

"Morning Abi, Merry Christmas." He said sleepily, "I hope Hamish didn't wake you up."

"No. I've just fed Anthony so I was off to the bathroom. Needed the loo."

"Oh ok." He said.

"Merry Christmas Dad!" and I went off to the bathroom.

It took a while to get everyone gathered downstairs as people wanted to make themselves tidy and presentable. It took me a while to get Daniel up (he had been drinking with Sherlock, John, Lestrade and Mycroft last night and things got out of hand a little bit). But once he was up he was ok. He carried Anthony downstairs and showed him the snow outside the window. Lestrade was tending to the fire, Phoebe, Amber and Hamish were inspecting their presents in their stocking, Joseph was sat on John's lap, looking around at everything and Rory was snuggled into Mycroft.

Once Lestrade had sat down by Rory, we let the children open their stockings. The three big children rushed to tear off the wrapping paper squealing in delight whenever they got something they liked. Mary helped Joseph open his and Lestrade opened Rory's. Anthony had a little stocking that had some toys in it that Daniel opened for him. He wasn't all that interested, he was having more fun watching everyone else open theirs.

We then had breakfast which was scrambled egg and bacon off of the turkey. I had a bit of toast as well. The adults (and people who weren't breastfeeding) had some Buckfizz and myself, Mary, Amber, Phoebe and Hamish had lemonade and orange juice. Lestrade was a surprisingly good cook which surprised me as it was always Jess who did the cooking when Sally, Johnny and I were growing up. John promised to help in the kitchen this afternoon in return for beer and peace and quiet- the kids were already becoming hyper. We then got dressed and washed and were downstairs to do the presents under the tree. There were quite a lot to get through. Daniel bought me some new clothes and some jewellery, Dad and Mum got me some new books that I would try and find time to read. John and Mary had bought us some baby stuff for Anthony and Mycroft and Greg had got us some recipe books. Daniel and I had bought Anthony some new clothes, some new toys and some new books.

The rest of the day passed quite pleasantly. Lestrade and John got dinner going in the kitchen and the mums (Mary, Molly and myself) decided to take the children out for a walk to hopefully[Kevin Man1] tire them out and to stop them from winding up John. It was a pleasant but cold walk in the snow and we all came back sopping wet because Mary, Molly and Hamish decided to start a snow ball fight.

Dinner was an enjoyable affair as Wanda and Timothy made it through the snow to join us. I had put Anthony down before dinner in the Moses basket in the living room. We all sat round the big table in the dining room to enjoy the product of John and Lestrade's partnership. The food was fantastic. The veg was perfectly cooked and the meat melted in the mouth. John had even done my favourite Pigs in Blankets which I couldn't get enough of. We chatted and ate and chatted some more. When the main course had been finished, Mycroft chimed his glass and stood up.

"I would like to thank you all for joining us today. I know the weather has made it hard for some people to reach us but they are with us in spirit. I want to thank John Watson and my husband Greg for their impeccable cooking and for that lovely meal." Everyone murmured in agreement. Mycroft continued, "It has been wonderful to be with our family at Christmas this year and to get to spend it with the latest edition, my grandson Anthony." I smiled, "Thank you Abi and Daniel for giving up your quiet family Christmas and spending it in our mad house."

"No worries, Myc," I said, "It's been really nice."

"The last thing I wanted to say, was to wish you all a Merry Christmas!" and he raised his glass to us all.

"Merry Christmas!" We all answered.

"And a happy new year!" added Lestrade and we all laughed.

We had a quiet rest of the day, watching trashy TV and the kids played with the toys they had received for Christmas. I curled myself into Daniel and fell asleep for a while until Anthony woke up and needed feeding. Mum and Dad disappeared for most of the afternoon and I knew what they were up to. I smiled to myself, glad that they had managed to sort out what they had to sort out and glad that they were moving forward. Sherlock and Molly deserved each other. That was one of the things that struck me about my family, was how much love we all had for one another.

So that was my son's first Christmas- love and family.

* * *

[Kevin Man1]


	2. January

**Chapter Two- January**

Daniel and I stayed in Chichester until New Year's Eve when we drove back up to London to celebrate New Year's with Sally, Johnny and Emily. Sally and Sam had gone to York to celebrate Christmas with Sam's family and Emily and Johnny had had a quiet Christmas to themselves. But we had all agreed to meet in a hotel in London to celebrate the New Year. Sally had her baby daughter Claire, who was one and a half and Johnny and Emily were expecting their first child in February. It would just be a quiet New Year's but we wanted to celebrate it together.

I had just finished feeding Anthony when there was a knock on the door. Placing Anthony in his crib, I went to answer it. It was Sally and Sam and little Claire. I let them in and shut the door behind them.

"How was York?" I asked.

"Cold," said Sally, "But we woke up to a white Christmas so it was pretty magical."

"We had a white Christmas too. Hamish, Phoebe and Amber loved it." I said, walking over to Anthony's crib.

Sally laughed, "Yes, I'm sure they did."

"Did you have fun, Sam?" I asked, picking Anthony up, "Seeing your parents?"

"Yes. It was nice to be with them this year." He replied.

"Ab, can I hold Anthony?" asked Sally, earnestly.

"Yes, of course." And I handed him over.

Sally held him gently and rocked him a little. He cooed and gurgled a little bit but settled into her arms. We chatted in the room for a bit before I got a text off of Emily telling us that they were downstairs. So I took Anthony off of Sally and carried him downstairs to the lobby. Daniel bought his little carry crib so that if he fell asleep we had somewhere to put him down.

Emily and Johnny had found a booth in the lobby and had got some drinks. She had a coke, Johnny had a pint of beer, Sally and I both had a glass of wine and Sam and Daniel had a whiskey. For a while Anthony stayed awake which was nice. He was happy and bubbily and was quite happy to be passed around everyone. Sally and Emily both doted on him. Sally was already a mother and so was very maternal around him. Emily loved to hold him and said that it was good practise for when they had their son but was happy to be able to hand him back.

Around half ten, Anthony fell asleep in Daniel's arms so he put him in his carry crib. He stirred a little as he was put down but soon settled again. Daniel then went to get another round of drinks for us and brought back champagne for New Years.

"So, how has work been Dan?" asked Sam, smiling.

"Oh Sam," he smirked, "I'd love to tell you, but then of course, I'd have to kill you!"

I rolled my eyes. "That one again. We know you're a spy, honey, there's no need to be so dramatic about it."

He kissed my forehead, "Spoilsport!" he said.

I laughed, "I'm supposed to be, I'm your wife!" I looked at Sally, "How's life for you? Is it strange working for your father?"

"We're kinda used to it now. What's strange is working for Donovan and Anderson." She said, sipping her wine.

"Is Anderson back then?" I asked, "I thought he went mad."

"Nope, he's back. And stranger than ever." She said, smiling. "Donovan is a nightmare to work with."

"She always was, even when I visited. She always asked me about Dad, like I was going to spill the dirt on him." I laughed.

"Who are we talking about?" asked Sam confused.

"Sally Donovan and Phillip Anderson. They are two detectives who work with Dad. Anderson went mad after Sherlock died and Donovan was always stubborn and still is." Explained Sally, looking at Sam.

"Oh." Said Sam, none the wiser. Sally laughed.

"I swear I've talked about this before!" she said.

"You probably have," he answered, "I may not have been listening."

"So," I said loudly, changing the conversation. "How has your pregnancy been, Emily?" I asked her.

"Yeah," she replied, "Yeah, its been good. Starting to get uncomfortable now." She said.

"Yeah," I added, "It does, but its 100% worth it when you hold him in the end."

Emily laughed, "Everyone tells me that."

I nodded, "Yep. It can get annoying after a while." Emily laughed again.

"How's work?" Sally asked Emily.

"Yeah, its really good. Keeps me busy."

"That's good." I said.

"How's maternity leave?" asked Emily.

"It's good at the moment. Daniel is home most days and Mum and Dad come down almost every other day." I paused. "Mum's thinking about having another baby."

"What?!" exclaimed Sally.

"Good for her!" Said Johnny.

"Yeah, it was really good news to hear. It means she's moving on." I said, "I know as well as anyone that grief can take a long time to overcome."

"Well then," said Johnny raising his glass, "Here's to a future Baby Holmes!"

We all raised our glasses and I looked down at Anthony in his crib to see if he was still asleep. To my surprise, those big brown eyes of his were staring back up at me. I smiled. I wasn't surprised. He had been a bit mixed up going from home to Chichester and then straight to the hotel we were in now. So he was bound to be a bit disturbed. Daniel tapped me on the shoulder.

"It's time!" he said and he kissed my cheek. So I picked up my son and followed everyone out to the balcony. We were overlooking the Thames, with the London Eye directly opposite us and the Palace of Westminster to the left. We were in the prime location to see the New Year in.

11:59. Big Ben began to chime. The timer on the side of the clock tower showed 20 seconds until midnight. Daniel passed me my champagne and I held Anthony so that he could see the fireworks too.

I looked back at the clock tower.

10… 9… 8… 7… 6 … 5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1…

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!" everyone around us cheered and clapped. I kissed Daniel and Anthony, hugged Sally, Emily and Johnny.

"Happy New Year, Dan!" I said, smiling widely.

"Happy New Year Abi!" he said, kissing me softly.

"And a happy New Year to you, young Anthony." I said, bouncing him up and down as we watched the fireworks.

2019.

A whole new year to spend with my family and friends.

A whole new year to see my son grow up and develop.

A whole new year of adventures.

And it is going to be a fantastic new year.

We walked back up to the hotel room after the fireworks and another drink. By this time it was one in the morning. I put Anthony in his crib and sat on the end of the bed. I took my mobile out of my pocket and phoned Sherlock.

"Happy New Year!" I said, down the phone.

 _And to you, he said in reply cheerfully._

"Is Hamish in bed?" I asked.

 _Yeah. Molly just put him to bed._

"Well, tell him I said happy New Year."

 _I will. What plans do you have for tomorrow? He asked._

"We're having a meal in the hotel here with Sally and Sam, Emily and Johnny." I told him. "What plans do you have?"

 _Probably a walk of some kind and then dinner with everyone. We're coming back up to London on the third. He said._

"That's good. Do you and mum want to come over for dinner that evening?"

 _That would be lovely. Thank you Abigail._

"Well, we'll see you on the third then." I said, "Goodnight Dad and a Happy New Year to you and mum."

 _Goodnight Abi. See you soon. Happy New Year to you and Daniel._

I hung up the phone and changed into my pyjamas. Climbing into bed, I saw that Anthony was fast asleep on his back, with his hands under his chin. I smiled and settled back into the pillows. Daniel climbed in next to me, kissed me on the forehead and settled next to me.


	3. February

**Chapter Three- February**

It seemed like no time at all before February was here. Anthony was growing fast. He could roll onto his front when he was on the floor. We had to keep an eye on him more. He was also sleeping on his own in the nursery which had been hard to get used to. Sometimes, Daniel would be up before me he would go and bring James and put him in the bed with us. These moments were precious. Daniel was back at work again now so the moments we had as a family were important. But when Daniel wasn't at work, I had plenty of visitors to keep me busy. If it wasn't Dad and Mum, it was Keira (Daniel's younger sister) or Sally or Emily.

February was also important for another special reason. Emily Lestrade had her first child at the end of the month. Here's how it went:

It was late February and I was out walking round the park with Anthony. I liked to have him out in the fresh air and he was good company. I got a call as I was on the bus home. It was from Sally. She told me that Emily had gone into labour and that I should get to the hospital quickly. (I was her birthing partner along with Sally). I got off the bus at the next stop and walked to the tube line. I got on and went to Euston Square. I had texted Dad to meet me outside the hospital and he was there. He had promised to look after Anthony for me.

"Thanks for doing this Dad." I said as I handed him the pram. "He's got his dummy and nappies in the changing bag. If you need a change of clothes, text Dan and he should bring you something. Um, he'll probably need feeding around one this afternoon and then he should sleep after that. Any problems just call."

"Abi, I got this, it's ok. You go help your friend." Dad said, kissing me on the cheek.

"You sure?" I said.

"Yes!" he laughed, "Now go!"

I smiled and went to Anthony. "Bye bye, kid. Mummy loves you. Be good for Grandpa Sherlock." And I gave him a kiss.

"Thanks Dad. See you soon." And I ran off into the building.

The hospital was huge. I had no idea where I was going so I went to reception.

"Hey." I said to the receptionist. "I'm looking for the labour ward. Can you tell me where it is?"

"Are you family?" she asked.

"I'm her sister in law and her birthing partner." I said.

"Ok, you need to go to the second floor. Obstetrics is the sign you are looking for."

"Thank you!" and I ran off to the second floor.

Sally was waiting for me outside.

"I'm sorry. I was walking round Hyde Park with Anthony when I got your text. Has much happened?"

Sally shook her head. "We've got her admitted and she's just getting settled as best she can right now." Sally led me through the ward. "Who's got the little man?" she asked.

"Dad and Mum if she's at home." I said. "Dad met me outside the hospital and took him."

"He'll be ok." Said Sally touching my arm.

"I know. This is the first time I've been away from him is all. But I'm here to help Emily." I said smiling.

Johnny stepped out of the relative room as we walked past.

"Oh Abi!" he said, "I'm so glad you're here!" and he gave me a hug.

"I'm glad she asked me." I said, hugging him back. "How are you?"

"Excited, nervous, terrified. Mainly for her. I'll sort myself out when it's all over."

I smiled at him. Just then a midwife came out to find us.

"Sally and Abigail?" she asked. We nodded. "You can come in now." And she went back into Sally's room.

"Good luck." I said to Johnny, giving him a quick hug as we left.

As we entered Emily's room, I was struck by how homely it seemed. Emily had gone out of her way to make it look not like a hospital. She was lying on the bed and smiled wearily as we entered.

"Hey." I said softly.

"You made it." She sighed offering her hand to me. I held it tightly.

"Of course I did. I would have crossed hell and high water to get here." I smiled at her.

She laughed. "Who has the little man?"

"Sherlock and Molly." I said. "Who has Claire?"

"My parents in Surrey. I've been staying with Em for a few days so that I didn't have far to come." She explained.

"Luckily, I was in London this morning." I said smiling. "Dan's back at work so I took Anthony for a walk round Hyde Park."

"Very nice." Emily said, "Did he enjoy it?" She winced slightly as another contraction hit her.

"Yeah. He was all wrapped up in the snow suit you and Johnny bought him for Christmas and he was awake and looking around. He doesn't like birds at the moment."

Sally, Emily and I laughed.

"Do you remember when we all met for the first time?" asked Sally.

Emily and I nodded.

"Didn't your dad have a summer party and we were all invited?" asked Emily. "It was a Saturday in July, scorcher of a day and by the end of it, we were chucking jugs of water over each other?"

I smiled. "Yep. That was it. I had to fight to get Sherlock to go cause obviously I was just a foster kid then so I couldn't go wandering around London by myself. But eventually he agreed and we came. I was so nervous."

"Why?" asked Emily.

"She hadn't seen myself or Johnny for what 6 years?"

"Seven. The last time we had seen each other was in a school hall on July 7 2005. I had no idea what they looked like then or what they would be like as people. I had no idea. Yet when we saw each other, it was just like old times."

We all thought for a minute and then Emily got another contraction. "Think of something else!" she gasped, "It helps!"

"Remember when we all got our GCSEs?" I said. "We all looked so pale and awful when we went in."

"Yeah, that's cause Daniel had convinced us we were all going to fail!" Sally said.

I laughed, "I forgot he was an arse in year 11!" I said. "The teachers were amazing and kept us happy all morning, even if we had done appallingly."

"But none of us did." Said Sally.

"I came out with 2As 6Bs and 2Cs." I said, trying to remember.

"4As 6Bs." Sally said.

"2A*s, 5As and 3Bs." Said Emily.

"And now look at us, an Anthropologist in labour, a police officer with a two year old and a student midwife on maternity leave!" commented Sally.

"Who would have thought that this is how life would be?" said Emily.

"We wouldn't have had it any other way!" I said.

"No, that is true." Emily laughed.

Just then the midwife came over to examine Emily. I looked at my two best friends. We had done everything together, always. There was no way anyone could have separated us.

"She's almost ready." Said the midwife.

Emily looked worried. I held her hand again. "This bit is the hard bit. I won't lie to you. But we're here and we're not going anywhere ok. So if it hurts, you squeeze down on my hand ok?"

Em nodded and looked calmer. For five seconds anyway before another contraction hit her. She squeezed down on our hands hard and screamed out.

"Breath," I told her, "Just breathe. It helps to calm you down."

Emily slowed her breathing down and she looked a lot calmer. Sally was stroking her arm.

"When the next pain hits, just focus on your breathing." I said.

"Or take some gas and air." Said Sally, "You'd be hilarious on Entonox." She said laughing. I hit her on the arm. "Hey!" she said.

"Not funny Sal." I looked at Em, "Though you would be pretty funny."

Emily glared at the two of us. "Thanks guys."

Sally reached for the gas and air as Emily braced herself for the next contraction. She reached for the tube from Sally's hand and breathed it in deeply. She moaned softly as the drug helped her to relax and the pain dissipated. For the next few hours this is what happened. A couple of times I left the room to update Johnny. Daniel had got off of work and was sat with him trying to calm him down and distract him. Then at around one thirty the following morning, the midwife told her that she was ready to push. Emily looked exhausted. 8 hours in labour that had been going nowhere had taken its toll on her. Sally and I were pretty tired too but the news that we could see a baby in the next few hours had us boosted again.

"Come on Em!" I said, encouragingly. "This is the last bit. You'll have your baby in no time. Ok? Just think about that."

Emily nodded weakly and shifted herself. The midwife was down between her legs again.

"Ok, Emily, on your next contraction, I need you to push." She said.

"It's ok, Em, we're here all the way." Said Sally. "Just hold our hands."

Emily squeezed down, time after time for a solid hour. By that time all of us were drained. It was now half four in the morning.

"Emily, the head is crowning. I need small pushes now, baby ones." Said the midwife. Emily panted softly as her baby's head was born.

"Ok, on the next contraction, I need one big push. One last push for me Emily. Do you hear me?" Emily nodded. She screwed her eyes up tight, clenched down on our hands and pushed with all of her might, screaming loudly.

It went silent for a few seconds.

Then, a piercing cry filled the room. Emily gasped as she heard her baby's cry for the first time. Sally and I chucked, tears in our eyes. I patted her shoulder and smiled.

"You have a boy!" said the midwife, holding him up for us to see.

"A boy?" Emily said, hardly daring to believe it.

"Congratulations Em!" said Sally, giving her a hug.

"Thanks. I have a boy!" she said smiling.

"Well done Em!" I said, hugging her also.

"Thanks Abi. Could you go out and tell Johnny that he has a son?"

I nodded and left the room. Once outside, I breathed a sigh of relief, mum and baby had made it through ok and Emily had a baby boy. I walked, almost ran, to the relatives room, where Johnny and Dan were.

"It's a boy!" I said smiling widely at Johnny. "You have a son!"

Johnny gasped in amazement as Dan clapped him on the back.

"Congrats mate!" he said smiling.

"Can I go see her?" he asked.

"Yeah sure!" I said and he ran out of the room.

I looked at Dan. He was smiling and as handsome as ever. I walked over to him and hugged him tightly.

"I love you, you know that?" I said looking up into his brown eyes.

"I love you too. How's Emily?" He asked.

"Exahusted." I said, "But happy!"

"I bet." He said. "How are you?"

"Shattered." I said.

"Let's get you home then." He replied, kissing me, softly. I kissed him back.

Daniel took me home and I fell asleep until eleven that morning. After a quick shower, change of clothes and a quick bite to eat, we drove to Dad's to pick up Anthony and tell them the news and then we went to the hospital so that Daniel could meet his nephew and Anthony could meet his cousin.

We got up to the ward and Johnny showed us to the room. Emily was lying in the bed with her son in her arms. She looked up as she saw us enter the room.

"Hey." She said softly.

"Hey you!" I said back, "Look at you mummy!"

Emily laughed. "He's perfect." She said looking down at her son, "Completely perfect."

"Hey, Emily." Said Daniel, "Can I?"

"Yeah sure." She said, holding her son up for Daniel to take.

"What have you called him?" I asked.

"Elijah." She said, "Elijah James."

"That's a beautiful name." said Daniel.

"Thanks."

"Anthony, meet your cousin." I said, wandering over to Daniel, holding Anthony. "Elijah."

Anthony looked for a minute at the baby sleeping in his father's arms, almost as if he was thinking about something. He then held out his hand and put it on Elijah's head.

Emily and Elijah came home the next day and we all went to theirs to celebrate.

A new baby had joined our ever growing family.


	4. March

**Chapter Four- March**

February faded into March. This was a special month for us as it was Anthony's baptism. We had a lovely service and a party in the village hall in Kingston-Upon-Thames. Anthony was as good as gold all day. He even fell asleep during his baptism!

At four months old, Anthony's feeds were getting fewer. Whilst this meant that he was growing, I missed the time that we had together when he was feeding. He was also more active and exploring his surroundings and he was always playing in his gym or with soft toys. We also took him out a lot more. He had had his immunisations and so we were starting to take him swimming. Sometimes we took Phoebe, Amber and Hamish as well. Hamish loved it. Sometimes I was finding being a mum hard, especially on the days when Dan was at work. He was my rock and everything seemed so much easier when he was around. I spent a lot of time with Emily and Elijah. Anthony seemed to enjoy this. He would gurgle contentedly and lay next to his cousin.

March was a special month for me. Not only was my son baptised and welcomed into the family of Christ but it was also my first mother's day. Mother's Day for me had been hard for most of my childhood- not having a mother to celebrate but then I found Molly. The plan was to have the morning with my boys and then go round to Mycroft and Greg's with Keira, Mum and Dad and Emily, Johnny, Elijah, Sally, Sam and Claire and have a big family meal.

Mother's Day dawned bright and sunny. I woke up and went to get Anthony. He wasn't in his cot so Dan had him. I walked downstairs and in the living room, I found my son with his Daddy at the table. A banner was across the French windows that said "Happy Mother's Day, Mummy!" On the table, Dan had made me breakfast and there were a few presents too.

I smiled as I walked over to them. I gave Dan a kiss and took Anthony. He cooed and looked up at me, smiling a little.

"He's saying 'Happy Mummy's Day' Mum!" said Dan, holding his hand.

I smiled and looked down at my son. Again I was struck by how incredibly lucky I was to have gone from having nothing to having a family- the best family in the world. I kissed his forehead and he scrunched up his eyes. I laughed softly.

"Thank you Anthony." I said.

"Come and eat. He's made you pancakes!" Said Dan, pulling my hand so I'd sit down.

" _He_ made me pancakes?" I asked, looking at my husband.

"Ok, ok!" he said, holing up his hands in mock surrender, "I helped." He smiled.

I sighed and rolled my eyes. Sometimes I wondered who the kid was and who the adult was.

We had a pleasant breakfast and morning. We took Anthony to the park as it was a nice day. We decided to go to Hyde Park because it was only half an hour away on the tube to Mycroft's London residence in Whitehall. It also contained the memorial fountain to Princess Diana and we thought it would be nice to take Anthony and go for a paddle. We took a little picnic and had lunch on the lawn. We got ice cream as we walked through Knightsbridge to the Tube. Anthony loved being on trains. Whenever we went on one he smiled and cooed. I didn't know whether it was the motion or the noise or the difference in location but he loved it.

We got to Mycroft's at around two in the afternoon. We were the first there. Anthony immediately got taken by Mycroft and Greg. I walked with Dan into the back garden and sat on the swing chair. Greg brought us a glass of wine each and we sat and watch Anthony played with his grandparents. Keira came down around half an hour after we arrived.

"Abi!" she said, happily.

"Keira!" I said, standing up and giving her a hug.

"How are you?" she asked looking at me.

"I'm good. We're coping. Not too keen on Dan being back at work and all that but it's ok." I said smiling.

"Look, if I could get Harry to give me more family time I would!" he said.

"I know, I know." I said, kissing him on the forehead. I played with his hair, "How about you, Kiera, how are you doing?"

"Yeah, all good. Still living with Dad and well, Dad!" she laughed. "I'm currently working for Kenneth Brannagh!"

"Oh my!" I said stunned, "Keira, that's amazing!"

"I know!" she said smiling widely, "We're doing Romeo and Juliet."

"Are you Juliet?" asked Daniel.

She nodded.

Dan got up and gave her a big hug. "Oh I'm so proud of you, lilbug!" he said.

"Thanks Dan!" she said, hugging him back.

"So who is your Romeo?" I asked, taking a sip of wine.

"Matthew, actually, is playing Romeo."

"Ooh, lucky you, getting to act opposite the boyfriend!" I said.

"Thanks Ab, that's really helpful." She said sarcastically. "Where's my nephew anyway?"

I laughed. "Look for one of your dad's and you'll find Anthony!"

So she went off in search of her nephew.

Over the next hour, everyone slowly arrived. Sally and Sam were next with Claire and Johnny and Emily came with baby Elijah and Mary, John, Amber and Joseph. Amber gave me the biggest hug ever when she saw me.

"Happy Mother's Day!" she said excitedly handing me a card.

I opened it curiously. It said:

 _Happy Mother's Day to my Godmother!_

I read the inside of the card and gave her a big hug. "Thank you so much Amber!" I said, "That was so kind of you!"

"You're welcome Abi!" she said smiling and she went off to find Phoebe.

Sherlock, Molly and Hamish were the last to arrive. Sherlock was smiling and holding Hamish's hand. He wore sunglasses and took them off to look at everyone. Molly looked simply stunning in a short summer dress with a hat and sunglasses. She was holding Sherlock's other hand and she appeared to be glowing. I'd never seen her that happy. I walked over to them and said hello. I gave Molly her Mother's Day card and gave her a hug. Hamish then wanted my attention so I played with my little brother for a bit.

All in all it was a pleasant afternoon. All the men gathered round the BBQ, beers in hand and all the mum's and Keira sat round the table watching their children play. Anthony was on his jungle gym mat playing with the toys that dangled down. Amber, Phoebe and Hamish started a game of Hide n Seek that Rory and Joseph tried to join in with but were too small to keep up with the big kids. So Joseph went and played cars and Rory went to his Daddy.

We all ate together and chatted and drank well into the evening. We only noticed how late it was when Amber fell asleep and almost put her face into her food. Greg suggested we stay the night and so we put the children in the nursery together. Once all gathered together again, Dad made an announcement.

"Molly and I have something we wish to announce!" he said smiling widely. "We, that is Molly is pregnant! We're going to be parents again!"

There was a collective gasp and cheers as everyone went to congratulate them.

"I thought you were glowing!" I said to Molly as I hugged her.

"Ha ha!" she laughed. "I've been dying to tell everyone for weeks but we never knew the right time!"

"I'm so happy for you guys!" I said hugging Sherlock. "Are you happy?"

"Oh definitely!" said Sherlock. I looked at Molly.

"I'm happy, Abi, I'm so happy, I could burst!"

"But please don't!" said Mycroft, smiling, "It would make a horrible mess on the lawn!"

"Thank you brother mine!" said Sherlock.

"Congratulations little brother!" he said giving him a hug. "And you too Molly!" and he gave her a hug as well.

So my first Mother's Day was a hit! I am so blessed to have Anthony in my life and we are blessed to have a wonderful family that just keeps growing. Baby Holmes is set to arrive in December.


	5. April

**Chapter Five- April**

April came around so quickly. I couldn't believe that I had been pregnant 5 months ago. April brought a change in weather. It was warmer, sunnier and brighter in the evenings. We were spending more time outside, be that in the park or our garden. Anthony was changing too, all the time. He was laying on his front more often now and would sometimes sit himself up which meant that our living room floor was a sea of cushions. The greatest surprise came one morning when I was making him some lunch. I often sing when I'm in the kitchen, it's a habit of mine. I finished making him lunch and got him in his highchair and began to feed him. Now like a lot of mother's, I make weird noise and faces to try to get him to eat. This one day when I was feeding him, he giggled for the very first time.

"DAN!" I yelled, smiling widely, "DAN! GET DOWN HERE!"

My husband came rushing into the room. "What?" he asked, looking worried, "What's wrong?"

"He laughed." I said, looking at Dan, "He laughed at me!"

"What?" he said.

"Look." And I made the same funny noise that I had made before and Anthony giggled again. "See?"

"Woah!" he said coming and sitting next to me. "He giggles!"

"Yeah." I said, wiping my eyes.

"Abi?" said Dan, putting his arm round my shoulder. "You alright?"

I nodded, swallowing and shaking my head a little. "I'm sorry, I just can't believe that our son can giggle now."

Dan smiled and rubbed my back. "I know." He said, "I know."

April had its highlights, like this one, but it was a very hard month for me. Dan works for MI5. I can't tell you what he does because I don't know what he does. Sometimes he gets sent away. I never know where he goes or what he does. And on April 13th he was sent abroad again.  
I had been out with my friends that morning, my friends from Uni, Nicole, Mollie, Beth and Holly. I hadn't seen them since Anthony's baptism so we'd gone out for coffee. Anthony was spending time with his Granddaddy's and Aunty Keira. I came home to find suitcases in the hall and Dan sat on the stairs.

"Abi!" he said as I walked in, standing up.

I looked at him. "What's going on?" I asked, worried.

"I have to go away, Ab," Dan said, taking my hands. "Harry's sending our team abroad."

I nodded. You get used to your husband being sent away after a while. "How long?" I asked, looking up at him.

"I don't know, Ab." He said, tucking a piece of hair behind ear, "I really don't know."

"You're going to miss Easter." I said, putting my hands round his neck.

"If I could get someone to cover me I would." He said, pulling me closer, "your husband's just too good at what he does."

I smiled. "Have you got time to pick up your kid?" I asked.

He nodded, "Where is he?"

So I told him where Anthony was and he left to get him. While he was gone, I packed a suitcase of my things and Anthony's. This was our house, it had always been our house and I didn't fancy being alone in it. I also phoned Dad and told him what was happening and asked if I could stay with them for a while. He said that it would be ok and he would pick us up that evening. I brought the suitcase back downstairs and put it with Dan's. Just at that moment, Dan opened the door and came in, carrying Anthony.

"How long until you go?" I asked, following him into the living room.

Dan looked at his watch. "About an hour." He said, "Zoe and Danny are coming to pick me up.

I nodded. I liked Zoe and Danny. They were good people and had a lot of time for Dan. They also doted on Anthony. Zoe was an attractive young lady in her late twenties to early thirties. She had short blonde hair and was well spoken. Danny on the other hand was a typical London lad. He was dark skin and very handsome but kind and generous and a good laugh. Danny was only a couple of years older than Dan and had taken him under his wing. Not that Dan needed looking after. He was a walking legend with his father being Mycroft.

We spent the next hour playing on the floor. Daniel made sure he got plenty of hugs and time with Anthony. I held his hand and snuggled into him, remembering his scent. I know it sounds silly but Dan was literally my other half. Without him, I was incomplete, I was lost. So I made every minute of that hour count.

All too soon, the doorbell rang. I went to answer it.

It was Zoe. She smiled at me as I opened the door and asked for Dan. I called him and he came out with Anthony in his arms. He sighed. He kissed Anthony on the head.

"I love you." He said, holding him above his head. Anthony giggled loudly. "Daddy loves you lots. Ok. Remember that, son, Daddy loves you." He brought him back down. "Daddy has to go away for a bit so you look after your mum. Because I reckon she's going to feel alone and scared…" he looked at me as he said this. I had tears falling down my cheeks, "… so she's going to need you. Look after her, love her for me and for you. I'll miss you lots, Anthony. Be a good boy and I'll see you really soon." He kissed Anthony again and handed him to me. He wiped the tears from my face and cupped his hands round my cheeks.

"I know you don't like this Abi." He said, "Neither do I. But I love you. God, I love you so much, it hurts, physically hurts. And every time I say goodbye it's like I'm ripping myself in half." He wiped fresh tears from my face. "I love you Abigail Holmes. And I'm going to miss you so much." He kissed me softly.

"I love you too." I whispered, touching my forehead against his. "Stay safe, please, and come home."

"I will." And he kissed me again softly but deepened it quickly.

I had to pull away. "Go." I told him. "Go save the world Daniel Holmes."

He kissed me and Anthony one last time, got his bags and walked out the door. I stood in the door frame and watched him go. The car turned around at the bottom of the lane and drove up and away. I looked at Anthony.

"Looks like it's just you and me kid." I said and I closed the door.

Easter weekend came a week after Dan had gone. We had long settled into Dad's house and Hamish was enjoying having his nephew around more. I was involved in Molly's pregnancy, asking how she was and we were comparing experiences. She was two months gone now and so she was getting morning sickness frequently. It got so bad that I had to feed Anthony in our room because the smell of banana was making her sick!

The week leading to Easter was fun. I was the only regular church goer in the house so I made sure the kids understood the religious aspect whilst Dad organised the fun side. I read Hamish, Amber, Joseph and Anthony the various parts of the Easter story and explained the best I could what was happening. Molly and Dad helped them make Easter bonnets and paint posters and banners for the house. John, Mary and I got busy planning an Easter egg hunt that they would sort out whilst Molly and I took the kids to church.

Easter Sunday dawned sunny and warm. I tried to phone Daniel but I didn't have much luck. I wasn't expecting much more than that so I left him a voice mail:

 _Hey Dan. It's me. I'm just calling to wish you a happy Easter and to let you know that we all miss you. I'm still at Dad's but I've been back to the house to check the mail and clean the house a bit. Um, Molly and I are attempting to take a 6 year old, a four year old, a one year old and a 5 month old to church today. Still wishing you were here. I'll try and send you a photo of them in their Easter bonnets. Anthony looks so cute in his. Anyway, we're about to go so I'll try and phone you later. I love you and miss you loads._

Church went as smoothly as it could with 4 kids. The service was brilliant and so child central. We left quickly after the service was over and I phoned home so that the men and Mary could ensure that the Easter hunt was ready. Greg and Mycroft were over with Phoebe and Rory but Mary was keeping them busy so that the surprise wasn't ruined. Keira and Matthew were coming by in the evening as they had an afternoon performance of Romeo and Juliet. We used the trains to get home as quickly as we could. Mary kept the older two kids in line whilst I had Anthony and Joseph in the pram. Once back at Baker Street, Amber and Hamish ran upstairs, Mary took Joseph and I carried Anthony upstairs.

"Abi! Abi! Come look!" called Hamish excitedly, appearing at the top of the stairs.

"I'm coming!" I called back, making my way up. Anthony had gone to sleep and he always seemed to weigh a ton more when he was asleep. As I reached the landing that separated John's flat from Sherlock's and led to the staircase that led to mine and Daniel's before we moved out, Hamish was waiting for me, grabbed my jacket and pulled me into the living room. Sherlock, John, Greg and Mycroft had really outdone themselves. The whole flat was decorated head to foot in Easter decorations- egg banners and carrots and rabbits etc. Greg had even dressed himself up as a rabbit!

Sherlock and John explained the instructions and gave them all baskets. He passed one to me but I shook my head. Anthony was just too small this year. Sherlock set all the kids off on the Easter egg hunt and I took Anthony upstairs to bed. As I put him down, looked at the photo taken of us all just after he was born. One happy family. I lay back on my bed, holding the photo and closed my eyes.

I must have nodded off because I was awoken by someone shaking me. I opened my eyes. It was Hamish.

"Abi? Abi wake up!" he said.

I rubbed my eyes, "I'm awake!"

"Daddy told me to wake you up because it's almost time to go out." He explained.

"Thanks Hamish." I said sitting up. I looked over at the cot and Anthony wasn't there. "Where's Anthony?" I asked panicking.

"Oh." Said Hamish, smiling. "He was crying so Mummy came to get him. He had a smelly nappy."

I nodded. "Thanks." I said again.

"No problem." He replied and left the room.

I rubbed my eyes again and got out of bed. I moved over to the chest of drawers and fixed my hair in the mirror. I put a flower in it and put some perfume on. I then brushed down my clothes and left the room.

We had booked reservations at Il Padrino in Leicester Square because that was closest to the theatre that Keira and Matthew were at. The plan was that they were going to meet us there. The restaurant was nice. It had a calming atmosphere and there was even a children's play area. Amber, Phoebe and Hamish immediately asked if they could play on it and Sherlock, Greg and Mary agreed. We sat down at the table and waited for Matthew and Keira.

Sherlock was sat next to me. "Hey." He said, putting his jacket over the back of the chair.." i

"Hey!" I said smiling as I put Anthony in his highchair.

"How are you doing?" he asked, putting his hand on my shoulder.

I smiled. "I'm doing fine Dad."

"Are you sure?" he asked, concerned.

"I'm sure." I reassured him.

"It must be hard, not having him around." He said sitting down.

I sat down as well, not looking at him but sorting Anthony out. "Yeah, course it's hard. But I know he's doing a good thing."

"Abigail…" he said, clearly not believing me. I looked at him.

"Dad…" I said in the same tone.

"I get that you miss him a lot but I'm here if you need to talk. You don't have to do this on your own."

"I know that Dad but you've got your own life now and you need to be there for Molly now anyway. I'm fine, Anthony's fine and I'm pretty sure Daniel is fine." I said taking his hands. "And thank you for having us to stay."

He smiled, "You're welcome, we love having you over and we love spending time with you."

I was just about to reply when Keira and Matthew walked in. Keira looked lovely in a Disney inspired dress and heels. Her long bushy hair was bouncy around her shoulders. Matthew was in corduroy trousers, with braces, a shirt and bowtie. He was carrying a bottle of champagne.

"Hey!" Keira said as she approached the table.

Everyone looked up.

"Hello!" said Mycroft, going over and kissing his daughter and shaking hands with Matthew.

"Sorry, we're late." Said Matthew.

"Don't worry about that." Said Molly.

"You're here now anyway." Added Mary. Keira and Matthew sat down and I went to get the children out of the play area.

Dinner was a pleasant affair with lots of chatting and drinking and laughter. Just after the main meal, I stood up.

"This part is usually left to Mycroft but I wanted to make a little toast this Easter." I cleared my throat, "To absent friends and friends to come, I wish you all a very happy Easter!"

"Happy Easter!" everyone replied, holding up their glasses.

So that was April. A pretty hard month, being without Dan but also a lot of fun.


	6. May

**Chapter Six- May**

I couldn't believe it was June already. My son was already half a year old. It was scary. What else was scary was the fact that Anthony could crawl. Well more commando crawl but still, it meant constantly watching him when he was on the floor. I had already begun to wean Anthony off of his milk constantly but now I was trying him on other foods like mashed down carrot and potato etc. His favourite was still mashed banana- much to Molly's distaste. He was also a bit more clingy than normal now and I wasn't sure if that was normal or whether that was because his Dad was away. The clinginess was also making me worried that he wouldn't go to Daniel when he came home.

I love May. The feeling of summer on the way, long walks in the park, barbeques, sunny evenings, cocktails with the girls. I was still living at Dad and Molly's which Hamish was pleased about. This May however was full of drama. It all began on the 15th of May:

The day started out quite well. I was walking in the park with Anthony, Hamish, Phoebe and Amber. We had just fed the ducks. Rory and Joseph had stayed at home. Phoebe was teaching Amber how to do a cartwheel and Hamish was pushing his nephew in the pram. I decided to stop for a while. So we got the picnic blanket out and sat down. I got Anthony on the blanket with some toys and sat and watched the girls doing gymnastics. All seemed perfectly normal and quite.

Then there was a loud bang- like a car backfiring.

I looked around suddenly. Everyone around us was doing the same thing. I got up and ran to the girls and brought them over to the blanket. Between us, we got everything packed up and we moved to the edge of the park. There was a large crowd gathering and someone was on the floor.

"Phoebe, keep an eye on the kids." I told her and I went to see if I could help.

I made my way through the crowd. A man with grey hair in his late-forties, early-fifties was lying on the ground, blood pooling around his shoulder area. I crouched down and gasped… it was Greg.

"Greg?" I asked, "Greg, can you hear me?"

He moaned softly.

"Someone call 999!" I shouted. "He's been shot!"

I took my scarf off and wrapped it round his shoulder to stem the bleeding. "Greg, it's ok. It's going to be ok!" I told him as sirens approached. Just then someone tapped me on the shoulder.

"Abi… Anthony's crying." It was Amber.

"Amber, sweetie, tell Phoebe she can take him out to calm him down but stay back ok." I told her as the Ambulance pulled up, "And bring me my phone."

The paramedics came and sorted him out. I told them as much as I could and they took him off. I looked down at my hands. They were coated in his blood but that didn't matter. Knowing I was going to have to wait around for the police, I went back to the kids.

"What happened Abi?" asked Hamish.

"A man was hurt really badly." I told him, "Hamish, can you take Anthony off of Phoebe please?" Phoebe handed the baby to Hamish and I took her to one side.

"What's up Aunty Abigail?" she asked.

"Sweetie, the man who was shot," I began.

"Is he ok?" she asked.

"He should be." I told her, "But Phoebe, it was your dad."

She looked at me blankly. "Dad… Dad was shot?"

"In the shoulder." I told her. "The ambulance men came and got him and took him to the hospital so he's in the best place. OK?"

She nodded and then suddenly threw her arms around me, crying.

"Please. Abi. He can't die. I don't want him to die, Abi!"

I calmed her down and got her to sit on the grass. I then explained to the others that phoebe's dad was the one who had been hurt. Hamish immediately went over to her and put his arms round her, holding her tightly. They were so close it was uncanny. I checked that Amber was still ok to hold Anthony and phoned Mycroft.

 _Mycroft Holmes speaking._

"Mycroft, it's Abi."

 _He sighed. Abi, you know I can't tell you anything about Dan…_

"It's not that Dad…" I said.

 _Abi. What's up? You never call me Dad._

I sighed. "Greg's been shot. I can't say much more because I'm with the kids."

 _The kids are there?! Did they see anything?_

"No." I said, "Luckily we were the other end of the park."

 _That's good then. What happened? He asked._

"I don't really know. On minute the kids were playing and we'd just started lunch and the next we heard the gunshot. I gathered up the stuff and walked to where the crowd was and saw him lying there. I tried to stem the…" I paused and looked at Phoebe, "anyway the ambulance arrived and he's going to St Thomas'. I'm going to drop Hamish and Amber at Dad's and take Phoebe and Rory down there."

 _OK. I'll meet you down there._

"Ok. And Dad…"

 _Yes?_

"You need to phone Dan, he'll want to know." And I hung up.

The police cam and got my statement. As quickly as I could, I dropped Hamish and Amber back at Dad's. I explained to Dad, Molly, John and Mary what had happened. John grabbed his bag and said he was coming with me. So we left the flat with Phoebe, Rory and Anthony in tow. We had to get off at Westminster Station and cross the bridge. Mycroft was already down there with Keira. Phoebe ran straight into his arms. He held her tightly.

"Thanks for getting here so quickly." He said, putting Phoebe down and taking Rory off of John. (He had decided to fall asleep).

"No worries." I said.

"How is he?" asked John.

"He's still in surgery." Said Mycroft, "The doctor said it was a clean shot straight through the bone. They've got to check for bone and bullet fragments and then sort out the arteries and nerves. Other than that he should make a full recovery."

"That's good?" asked Phoebe, looking up at her dad.

Mycroft picked her up again. "Yes, sweetie, it is. Daddy is going to be ok." And Phoebe smiled for the first time that day. Keira went and held Rory for her dad. She was a natural with children and we were all waiting for the day when she and Matthew had children of their own.

The day seemed to pass slowly when Greg was in surgery, waiting for the doctor to come and give us news. It got to four in the afternoon and I had to make my excuses as I had to get home for Anthony's dinner and bath. I gave Mycroft a hug and told him to call me if anything changed. He promised he would and told me to not worry about having to go home. He said that Anthony came first. I was leaving the hospital when Kiera ran up to me.

"Keira?" I asked, confused.

"Let me come help you." She said, "I don't like hospitals and I don't like the idea of waiting around for someone to tell me my dad's fate. Let me come and help you." She had a determined look on her face and even if I told her no she was going to come anyway.

"Ok, I could use an extra pair of hands." I said.

Keira hugged and thanked me. We walked across Westminster Bridge in silence. As we approached the station. Big Ben chimed. I counted the bells and worked out that it was 6 in the evening. I was already running late. We boarded the train quickly and got the tube to Waterloo station. We then boarded the next train out of London. We were back in Kingston by 7:15. I got Anthony fed (he had pureed sweet potato and mashed banana) and bathed. Keira helped by making our dinner and cleaning up Anthony's things. Once I had given him bottle and settled him, Keira and I curled up on the sofa and put some Grey's Anatomy on. Keira slowly fell asleep and had her head in my lap. I sat and stroked her hair, running over the day's events in my head.

I must have nodded off myself because I was woken up by Anthony screaming. I got up and turned the monitor down so as not to wake Keira up. I stretched. Sleeping on the sofa wasn't the best idea I'd ever had. I hadn't done it since the days when we thought Sherlock was dead.

I went upstairs and found Anthony crying in his cot. I looked at the time, 4:30am, the little clock read.

"Right on time." I muttered, picking him up. I took him downstairs and got him a bottle made up. (It's incredible what you can do one handed as a mum). I sat on the other sofa, facing the window that looked over the drive. Keira was still asleep, the early dawn light making a halo round her head. The curtains were opened so I could see out on to the street. It was quiet, except for a black SUV that was coming down the street from the top of the road. It turned around at the bottom and stopped in front of the house. At first I thought it was Mycroft but then out got…

"Daniel!" I said, standing up and going over to the front door. Daniel walked up the drive looking shattered. He looked up at the door and saw me standing there with Anthony in my arms. He dropped his bag and ran the rest of the way up, kissing me as he reached us. I moaned softly, rubbing my head against his as we pulled apart.

"I've missed that!" I said, softly.

"So have I!" he said, taking my hand as he came in the house. I shut the door behind him. "I've missed all sorts of things." He added winking. "But most importantly, I've missed you and our son."

"We've missed you too." I said, "But what are you doing here?"

"Dad." He said simply. "He phoned Harry, explained what had happened and the next thing I know, I'm on a plane home. I popped into Dad's on my way here and he updated me."

"Oh." I said, having a quick look at Keira. She was still asleep so I headed up the stairs. Daniel followed me. "So how is he?"

"Groggy, sore, confused, tired." He said, "Dad's waiting until the morning to see if he can get a description off of him as to who shot him. It's a long shot but if we're going to have any hope at catching whoever shot him this is our best shot."

I just nodded.

"I hear you were at the scene?" Daniel asked.

"Yeah." I said.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

"I'm fine. We didn't see anything. We were the opposite end of the park. By the time we got there the incident had happened."

"Ab, you may have saved his life, you know that, don't you?"

I nodded as I put Anthony is his cot. "Well, I couldn't let him bleed out on the pavement." I smiled slightly turning round to face him.

Daniel cupped my face with his hands and kissed me. It was slow at first and then became more intense. He backed me onto the wall of the nursery. I looked at him and took his hand and led him into our bedroom.

A couple of hours and several lovemaking sessions later, we were curled into each other on our bed. Daniel was stroking my hair, softly.

"I missed you!" he said.

"I missed you too!" I replied.

The rest of the day passed smoothly. We stayed at home that morning and Dan played with Anthony, while Keira helped me tidy up the house. At half one, we left to get the train back into London to go visit Greg. Anthony sat on his daddy's knee on the train in and on his Aunty Keira's knee on the tube. Daniel asked at the front desk which ward and room he was in and we went up to see him.

Already there were Mycroft, John, Sally, Johnny, Emily and Baby Elijah. We all greeted each other in whispers as Greg was asleep.

"Has he woken up yet?" I asked as I hugged Mycroft.

"He only got out of surgery 2 hours ago!" said John, taking Anthony.

"Really?" asked Keira, looking down at her stepfather.

Mycroft nodded. His eyes were red and puffy with large dark circles under them.

"Have you slept?" Dan asked his dad.

"He hasn't left yet." Said Johnny.

Dan sighed. "Go home Dad, and get some sleep."

Mycroft shook his head.

"Seriously, Dad, go and sleep. We'll stay here with him." Said Sally.

"I'm not leaving him!" Mycroft said, firmly. "I'm not going anywhere. For God's sake, he was shot yesterday, we don't know who by or what purpose they hoped to achieve but he was shot! Gregory was shot!" he took a pause, looking at us all. "If it were any of you, would you leave? Abi, if it were Dan lying here would you leave?"

"Obviously I wouldn't but…" I began.

"Exactly! I don't see why it's any different for me. I love him! Ok, I love him! Greg means the world to me. I've never felt this way before. I would move heaven and earth for him if I could, I would be lying there in his place if I could!"

"No… you wouldn't…" said Greg weakly. Everyone looked at him.

"What?" asked Mycroft.

"You wouldn't be lying here." He said, opening his eyes. "You wouldn't be out in the field, it's a world of goldfish remember."

Mycroft smiled and walked down to sit by Greg. "I would embrace a world of goldfish if I could walk with you every day." And he kissed him on the forehead.

"I know you would." Smiled Greg.

"You scared us you know, scared me. I thought I was going to lose you."

"You'll never lose me." He said, "I don't plan on going anywhere any time soon."

"Good." He looked into Greg's eyes. "Will you marry me?" he asked suddenly.

There was a sharp intake of breath in the room.

"What?" Greg asked, stunned.

"Will you marry me, Gregory Lestrade?"

"Yes! Of course I will!" and they kissed each other.

We all cheered and clapped as loudly as we could without being told off by the nurses.

"Congrats you two!" squealed Sally and Keira.

"Very well done!" said John.

"I'm so happy for you!" Emily, Keira and I said.

"About time!" said Dan.

Mycroft and Lestrade looked up at all of us, smiling. We spent the rest of the day at the hospital until we were shooed out by the nurse. As we left, Mycroft curled up on the bed next to Greg and held him close.

So May was pretty eventful. Dan stayed off work for a couple of weeks while Greg was in the hospital so that he could help his Dad. Greg was discharged from hospital on the 27 May and was on strict orders to take it easy. He was off of work for the rest of the year. Summer starts soon and I'm looking forward to spending it with my family!


	7. June

**Chapter Seven- June**

So it's June.

It's been seven months since my baby boy was born. He had grown so much in that time. He was no longer my tiny baby who could snuggle into my arms. Daniel could no longer hold him in one arm either. He was able to sit up unsupported and was taking his tentative first crawls. We knew that it wouldn't be long until he would be crawling at light speed across the living room floor. The sleepless nights were back too as he had started teething. Molly had bought us some teething stuff- toys and gels that kind of thing. I couldn't believe that my baby boy was growing up. Dan thinks I'm silly getting sentimental sometimes but I can't help it- it's just something mother's do.

June was a busy month. With Lestrade off work and still not able to move his arm properly, Mycroft was having to do more at home, what with a one year old to look after. Keira and Mollie were great, spending all their spare time helping their dad look after the house and Lestrade. But they had full time jobs that required them to be away for long periods of time and Mycroft knew that they had their own lives. Dan would go round when he could. I wanted to go round and help but I think adding another baby to the mix would just push on Mycroft's already stretched nerves.

June also meant Father's Day. Having been wonderfully surprised on Mother's Day, I wanted to do the same for Dan. So when Anthony woke up for his half five feed, I took him downstairs and got everything sorted. I had balloons and banners that said 'Number One Dad!' All of his gifts were on the table. I also began to make him a full English breakfast when he walked in.

"Hey," he said sleepily (Anthony had kept us up a lot of the night). "Whatcha doing'?" he asked, rubbing his eyes and looking for the coffee pot.

"Making you breakfast!" I said, smiling and fetching him the coffee. He yawned widely and scratched his head.

"Oh that's nice of you!" he said, kissing my forehead and taking the coffee. "What have I done to deserve this?"

I laughed, "You have no idea what today is?"

Dan looked blankly at me, and then like a lightbulb going off in his head, his eyes widened and he smiled at me.

"It's Father's Day!" he said, excitedly. "My first father's Day!"

"Yeah!" I said, smiling at him, "And seeing as you and your son surprised me on Mother's Day, I thought I would do the same for you."

"Aww bless you, Abigail Holmes!" he said, kissing me softly.

I put my hand through his hair, "Go say hello to your son." So Dan left and went to find Anthony, who cooed and gurgled when he saw his Dad come in. I smiled and got on with my cooking.

Dan had a nice morning with his son. Since it was June, we spent a lot of time in the garden, in the sun. In the afternoon, we were going to Grandma and Grandpa's in Sittingbourne, Kent. Sherlock and Mycroft had organized it because they had a big enough house to have all of us and it was out of London. Mycroft wanted to get Greg out of the city for a bit so they were already there with Keira, Mollie, James and Matthew. Sally and Sam were coming along with Johnny and Emily. Sherlock, Molly, Hamish, John, Mary, Amber and Joseph would also be there.

It took us just over an hour to get to Sittingbourne. Anthony was now in the back of the car so I was able to ride in the front with Dan. We held hands for most of the trip. It was around three in the afternoon by the time we got there. I was greeted by Hamish, Phoebe and Amber. Hamish immediately relieved me of Anthony and carried him inside. Amber and Phoebe helped us with bags and were filling us in on what had happened before we got there when we saw Molly and Sherlock walking out to greet us. Molly looked stunning in a light and flowing summer dress. You could just make out a tiny bump under it. Sherlock was laid back in a T-Shirt and shorts, with sunglasses perched on his head. Very casual for Sherlock.

"Abi!" called Molly, "You made it!"

"Of course we did!" I said, giving her a hug. "I wouldn't miss Father's Day!"

"How are you Dan?" asked Sherlock, shaking Dan's hand. "Enjoying Father's Day?"

"Very much so." He replied, smiling. "I've been well and truly spoiled."

"How about you Dad?" I asked, also giving him a hug. "Has Hamish spoiled you?"

"Yes. I got some lovely things." He said, looking at Molly and smiling.

"Come on in and see everyone else!" said Molly, pulling my arm and leading me into the garden. Mycroft, Greg, Wanda, Timothy, Sally, Sam, Emily, Johnny, Keira, Matthew, James and Mollie were all standing around, chatting. Amber, Anthony, Joseph, Phoebe, Rory, Claire and Elijah were running round the swings and slide at the end.

"Abi!" Called Mollie, running up and giving me a hug.

"Nice to see you too, Moll!" I said, hugging her back. Dan went over to find his Dad.

"Hello, Keira, Matthew, James." I said, waving at the lads and giving Keira a hug.

"Hey!" the boys replied.

We stood around chatting before Dan made a toast to all the Father's and Mycroft thanked everyone for being there. We had an amazing barbeque in the garden and put the children in the bath. We then drove home. It was late when we got in but we didn't mind. Anthony was asleep so we put him in the nursery and fell asleep in our own bed.

June was also a big month for me. After months of putting it off and declining suggestions, I finally decided to take Anthony to see my mum and Dad- Anthony and Karen. I had no idea what I was in for but it felt fair. I decided that I was going to go at the end of June. I got their address off of Greg and arranged it with them. Needless to say they were both excited- well at least someone was. I would be going on my own as Dan was away on a conference training thing for work (I wasn't supposed to ask questions). I was worried about taking Anthony away without his Dad but it had to be done and I'd rather do it before we went away for the summer.

The day came when I had to pack up the car and go to Yorkshire. Daniel helped me get everything in and say goodbye. He put Anthony in the car and gave him a kiss. He then came and walked up to me, taking my hands.

"Are you sure you're ok with this?" he said.

I looked into those deep brown eyes and everything I was worried about just melted away. "I'm sure. I need to do this. And they have a right to be in Anthony's life."

"No they don't!" Dan said, smiling. "They're supposed to be dead!"

"But they're not and I can't consciously keep him away from them anymore."

Dan sighed. "I'm never going to know what goes on in your head." And he kissed me on the forehead.

"Good." I said, looking up at him. "I should hate to be predictable!"

Dan laughed and we kissed each other goodbye. And then it was time to go. I looked into the back of the car and saw Anthony smiling at me. I smiled.

"Just you and me, kid!" I said and slowly pulled out of the drive.

I took a deep breath and constantly told myself I could do this. I didn't know why I was so nervous. I mean, they were my parents after all and I had seen them since I had been with Sherlock. I was never going to forget them rocking up at my wedding as if everything was going to be fine. But I had been with Daniel that day and somehow, Dan had a way of calming me that no one else did. This time it was just me… and Anthony of course.

It took me just over 5 hours to reach their house. I had to stop several times to change and feed Anthony and to look after myself. I drove up to the front of the house and stopped the car. I looked in the back and Anthony was asleep. I looked at the time, it was twenty to eight in the evening. I phoned Dan.

 _Hello? He said as the phone connected._

"Hey," I said, "It's me!"

 _Abigail! He said, happily. I'm so happy to hear from you. Did you make it ok? Are your parents happy to see you? Are you happy? And how's Anthony? Is he ok? Was he good on the way up there?_

"Woah!" I said, smiling, "Slow down! I'm here ok but I haven't gone in yet. Anthony's fallen asleep so I thought I would talk to you. He was very good on the way up, ate all his food and he's been asleep since just after seven.

 _That's good! He said. God, I miss you like hell!_

I laughed. "I miss you too." I paused. "Is this the last time I'm going to be able to talk to you?"

Dan sighed. _I can call you tomorrow morning but it will be quite early and then I'm in lock down._

I nodded. "For how long?"

 _I can't tell you that, Ab, I'd love to. I'll call you as soon as it's over._

"Ok. Well, I'd better get going and say hello."

 _I love you, Abigail Holmes, so very much._

"I love you too, more than you could ever know." And I hung up.

I grabbed my bag and Anthony out of the car and walked up to the front door. It was a charming little house that my parents lived in. A small, neat garden lay next to the drive and there were pebbled hopping stones that formed a path to the door. Under the window sill lay small flower beds. Light was coming from the window which told me that my parents were waiting for me. I knocked on the door.

A few seconds passed and then someone opened the door.

"Abigail!" said my father, Anthony. "You made it!"

"Hi." I said, smiling.

"Come in, come in!" and he stood back to let me in.

"Thank you," I said. "It's a lovely house."

"Thank you!" Anthony said, smiling from ear to ear, "Your mother did most of the work. She…"

"…loves to garden." I finished, smiling despite myself. "I remember."

Anthony smiled at me and then looked at little Anthony. "Is this him?"

I nodded. "This is Anthony Daniel Holmes, your Grandson." I said softly, looking down at him. "He fell asleep just past Leeds."

"Bless." He said, smiling. "I can remember when you were that big."

I smiled. "Is there somewhere I can put him to sleep?" I asked, my arms beginning to ache.

Anthony nodded. "Come with me."

I followed him along the hallway. The colour was mutual in tone but the walls were decorated in family photos. Photos that I hadn't seen in a long time of their wedding day and the few years they were married before they had me. I noticed there were no photos of me except for one black and white one of Daniel and I on our wedding day that we had sent. Greg and Mycroft explained that they couldn't really have photos of me as it would defeat the purpose of their new identities. There were baby photos though and photos of two younger children whom I didn't recognise. I was sure it would be explained to me.

Anthony led me through the kitchen and into a room at the back of the house. It was a large room, very airy and bright. The walls were a soft yellow colour and there was some simply artwork around. Some I recognised as works by Karen and some by Jessica Lestrade. That's how they met, through late night art classes. There was a wardrobe in the corner of the room, a chest of drawers on the same wall and a vanity mirror on the adjacent wall. In the middle of the room was a double bed with a pale blue duvet cover on. At the bottom of the bed was a crib for Anthony. I put my bag on the bed and put my son in the crib, covering with a light blanket. I kissed him on the cheek and turned around to see Anthony stood in the doorway, tears glistening in his eyes.

"What?" I asked, surprised to see such emotion in his eyes.

"It's nothing," he said softly, "It's just you're a mother and you're such a natural. You remind me of your mother."

I smiled. "Where is she?" I asked.

"In the living room." And I followed him back out of the room. The living room was at the front of the house and was a large and homely room. The main feature was a beautiful fireplace which was unlit as it was the summer. There were two squishy sofas and a couple of armchairs around the room. A TV set was at the end by the window and was playing 'Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban' which was my favourite of them all. My mother, Karen, was sat on the furthest sofa from me with a young girl snuggled into her. A young boy, no older than Rory Holmes was asleep in another armchair. A frown furrowed across my face. I had a funny feeling I knew what was coming and I wanted to find out.

Anthony coughed to announce my presence.

"Oh, Abigail!" cried my mother rising from the sofa. The young girl rubbed her eyes and looked up at me with deep round brown eyes, exactly like Anthony's!

"Hello!" I said, not with the same enthusiasm.

"How are you?" she asked as she came over, cupping her hands round my face. "How was your journey? Not too troublesome?"

"It was fine. We got caught in traffic coming across London because I wanted to say goodbye to Hamish and Amber but other than that it was fine."

"And how's that Daniel of yours? It's a shame he's busy. What is it you said he does?"

I had rehearsed this line so many times. "Computing." I answered, "He's on a training course at the moment which is why he isn't here."

"Well, I still say its shame. And what about young Anthony?" She asked.

"In bed. He fell asleep outside Leeds." I explained my eyes still fixed on the young girl. There was something extremely familiar about her. Karen noticed where my eyes were fixed and looked up at Anthony. I looked at him as well. He just nodded, as if to encourage his wife.

"Jackie, come here sweetie." She said softly, the way she used to speak to me when I was young. Jackie got up and went to Karen. She was a cute looking girl of around Amber's age. She had dark brown hair that was tied back in two plaits. She was in her pyjamas which were 'Harry Potter' ones. She had Anthony's eyes and a button nose.

"Abigail, this is your sister, Jackie." Karen said, holding her breath as she looked at me.

My mouth fell open. I had a sister! An actual, biological sister!

"Hi, Abigail." She said quietly looking up at me with those big brown eyes.

"I thought she looked familiar!" I said, looking down at her. "That's me when I was that age!"

"Really?" asked Anthony, looking between us.

"How old are you?" I asked softly.

"I'm twelve!" she said, proudly.

"We didn't know you when you were twelve." Said Karen sadly.

I nodded in response. "I know." I said, "But, Jackie is exactly like me."

"You mentioned Hamish and Amber. I remember them from your wedding?" Anthony asked.

I sat on the edge of a chair. "Hamish is my brother, Anthony's uncle, my dad's son. He had a twin sister, Elizabeth, but she died of Meningitis when she was two…"

"Oh how awful!" commented Karen, not flexed by the fact that I acknowledge Sherlock as my dad.

"Mum is pregnant again now, she's due in December. Amber is John's little girl. Well I say little, she's Jackie's age!"

"And I'm not little!" interjected Jackie.

"No!" I said laughing slightly.

"I didn't know you were pregnant mum!" said Jackie, looking up at Karen.

Karen looked alarmed. "I'm not…" and then it dawned on her. Jackie thought that when I said 'Mum' she thought I meant Karen and not Molly.

"Jackie…" I began, "I was told that your mum and dad, well our mum and dad, had died when I was twelve years old. Their names and identities had gotten muddled with someone else's and so I was put in the foster system…" I looked at Karen who nodded, happy that I hadn't told her the real reason. "A nice man, called Sherlock…"

"That's a silly name!" said Jackie, screwing up her nose.

"I know." I smiled, "But he is a nice man. Sherlock adopted me as his own daughter which is why I call him Dad. He married a lovely lady called Molly which is why I call her mum. She's the mum who's going to have a baby."

"Oh!" said Jackie, "Sorry Mum."

"That's ok!" she said, smiling. "Now I think it's time you went to bed. Say goodnight!"

"Goodnight Abigail!" she said, hugging me tightly. "I'm ever so glad you're my sister!"

Tears welled in my eyes. "Goodnight Jackie. I'm glad you're my sister too!"

I sat back down as Anthony, Karen and Jackie went upstairs. My head was running wild. I had a sister!

I sank back in the chair, smiling widely. Maybe this trip wouldn't be so bad after all.

The little boy on the couch stirred. "Mummy?" he asked bleakly as he sat up. His eyes found me. "You're not my mummy!" he said.

"No," I said gently, going over to him and crouching down. "My name is Abigail. Can you tell me yours?"

"Michael," he said, "Michael James McNiesh!"

"Well, Michael, would you like me to take you to your mummy?" I asked, kindly.

He nodded holding out his arms. I picked him up and he lay his head on my shoulder. I smiled. Just like Hamish did when he was tired.

The rest of my trip went smoothly. I got to know my parents and siblings better and they got to know Anthony. Speaking of Anthony, he was such a happy baby, always smiling and gurgling away. Except when he was hungry or tired that is. I stayed up in Yorkshire for a week and went home when Dan phoned. I was happy that I gone, very happy but I was happy to get home to my husband and family.


	8. July

**Chapter Eight- July**

July came all too quickly. The summer was here and seemed to be staying. Britain is notorious for having 3 day summers with weeks of rain in between, but this year, the wonderful weather seemed to here to stay. This was fantastic, of course, but proved difficult when trying to keep an eight month old safe and out the sun.

It was hard to believe that Anthony was eight months old now. He was a chubby little thing, his big round eyes still his most identifiable feature. By now he was a confident crawler and was obviously able to recognise people as he would crawl to whoever called him.

But the big clue to the fact that our little boy was growing up was when he said his first words.

It happened one afternoon in early July. I was busy cleaning the living room so I had Anthony in his high chair and Daniel was sat doing work on the sofa.

"Are you sure it's ok for you to be doing that in here?" I asked, smiling as I sat next to him on the sofa.

"Yeah." He said, not looking up from the sofa, "Why wouldn't it be?"

"Official Secrets and everything?"

Dan looked up at me, "It's the house account!" he said with a smile, "I'm pretty sure Harry wouldn't be that interested in our private lives."

I smiled back, "Oh, I don't know, he seems quite besotted with our Anthony."

We both looked over at him. Anthony smiled at us and giggled. It was so infectious; we couldn't help but smile back.

"Well, who wouldn't be!" said Dan, walking over to the highchair and picking him up.

"Da…" said Anthony.

Dan looked at me stunned and quickly came back over to the sofa.

"Did he just…" began Daniel.

"Da…da!" said Anthony again, smiling.

"He did!" I said, with tears in my eyes, "He said Da Da!"

"Can you say Ma, ma? Anthony, say Ma, ma!" said Dan, looking at his son.

Anthony looked for a minute and then said, "Da, da!" again. Dan looked at me apologetically.

I smiled, "Don't worry, Dan. M is a harder sound to make!"

So our little boy can speak, kind of. He has started saying ma now which is a relief. July is a very special month for Daniel and I. It's the month we got married in. We were married on the 7 July 2013. I chose the day partly because I could get away with not telling people I was pregnant and because I wanted something happy to remember on that day. We had planned to spend the day quietly, just the three of us and then Sam and Izzy had agreed to babysit for us so that we could go out in the evening.

Or so I thought.

Being married to an MI5 agent can be an incredible and wonderful thing, but can also be highly irritating, especially when he gets posted overseas or has to attend conferences. I know that he has no choice but I hate it when he's gone. So when he told me that he had to attend a conference on Security and Terrorism in Europe that was being held in Brussels, I wasn't best pleased. Especially when he told me he would be away for our anniversary. He said he would try and talk to Harry and come back for the day but that I wasn't to get my hopes up. I told him I understood and kissed and waved him goodbye like normal on the fifth of July. I told myself there would be other anniversaries and other times to celebrate but this was our first anniversary and we had been through a lot in our first year of marriage.

The morning of the seventh, dawned bright and sunny. Like clockwork, I was woken at 5:30 by my son and went to feed him. I put Anthony in his bouncy chair in the bathroom and ran myself a bath. As I soaked in the bubbles, I told Anthony all about our wedding and how I got ready and what my dress was like. Then, I got dried and dressed and went downstairs. I made myself some toast and butter and mashed some banana for my boy and we had breakfast together. I had no idea what I was going to do for the rest of the day. Probably clean and tidy the house. Hamish, Phoebe and Amber had all been over the day before and my living room looked like a scene from a disaster movie!

We had a quiet morning. I put 'Finding Nemo' on for Anthony and he sat and watched it and was happily playing by the time I made us some lunch. The post was late today which was brilliant. Somehow, if the post was late, it would be an awful rest of the day. Molly and Dad came by in the afternoon and gave me a card and present. I had just made them a drink when the doorbell rang again. This time it was Lestrade and Mycroft. Lestrade's arm was still up in a sling. They came in and joined Sherlock and Molly in the living room.

"Happy anniversary!" said Molly as I joined them.

I smiled, "Thanks mum!"

"Shame Dan couldn't be here." Said Mycroft.

"Well, his work is important too. We're planning on Skyping later so at least we'll talk." I said, not meeting anyone's eyes.

"Abi, your mum and I were wondering if you'd like to come out to dinner with us tonight?" asked Sherlock, "John and Mary have agreed to have Anthony for the night so you don't have to find childcare for him."

I looked up at him. "Well, I was hoping to talk to Dan tonight…"

"Go on, Abi. It's been ages since you've been out properly!" said Lestrade, enthusiastically. "You of all people deserve a night out!"

"But what if Dan calls and I'm out?"

"I shouldn't think that would be a problem." Said a strangely familiar voice from over by the door. We all looked up.

There stood in the doorway, looking worn out and harassed was Daniel!

"Oh Dan!" I cried, running over to him, "You came back!" I kissed him, passionately. He kissed me back.

When we broke apart, I had tears streaming down my face. "How come you're home? I thought you couldn't get out of it?"

"Well, Dad pulled some strings so that all of the meetings I needed to be in were yesterday and the day before. I got the first flight out of Brussels this morning!"

I looked over at Mycroft, amazed.

"I couldn't let my son miss his first wedding anniversary." He said, looking at the two of us. I walked over to him and gave him a hug.

"Thank you!" I whispered in his ear.

"Your welcome!" he whispered back, kissing my cheek.

Everyone stayed for a little while longer and then left us in peace. Mum took my hand as we left.

"That offer of having Anthony for the night still stands!" she said winking.

We did go out in the end. We dropped Anthony off at mum and dad's then headed of for something to eat. Dan had found this really romantic restaurant and we had a wonderful meal. We ate, drank and talked all night and then wandered back to the tube, arm in arm. Neither of us slept that night. I had my husband back and all was right in the world.

It struck me as to how much had changed in a year. We were now 20, married and parents. Emily and Johnny were parents, Molly and Sherlock were going to be parents again, Greg and Mycroft were engaged. All of our lives had changed and for the better. The one thing that remained constant was my love for Daniel. He was my best friend, my lover and my husband. I recalled what I said to him on our wedding day: "You are the most amazing man I have ever been with and the one I was always going to marry. I love you Daniel, to the end of time and back." And I still do.


	9. August

**Chapter Nine- August**

August.

The middle of summer.

Baking in the city!

Don't get me wrong. Summer is great and fantastic and you can get a lot done.

But does it have to be so bloody hot!

Anthony was now 9 months old. Which was scary! He was a pretty advanced crawler now which meant that you couldn't leave him anywhere on his own. He was also starting to pull himself up onto furniture and walk along slowly. Our living room was still littered with cushions and soft things so that if he fell backwards, he would be ok. He was talking more coherently now and not just 'mama' and 'dada' but he would call Sherlock, Mycroft and Lestrade 'gagdad' and Molly 'gagma'. Keira and Mollie still didn't have a name as did a lot of our friends and family, but that would come with time.

Anyway, August meant holiday month for us and Sherlock, Mycroft and Lestrade had organised a big family holiday to the states. It was very exciting. We would be spending a week in New York (following some very exciting news) and then two weeks in Florida. The reason we were going to New York was because of some news that Keira had received. She had been offered a role in the company of Wicked! The Musical, on Broadway. She was so excited and had decided to go out to New York with Mollie, Matthew and James to look at where she would live and practical stuff like that. She also had to do a week of rehearsals with the existing company so that she knew how the show would run and what she had to do before proper rehearsals started next year. I had always wanted to see New York and so had other people of my family so we all planned to go out and have fun while Keira was in rehearsals.

The flight was fairly interesting. It was the longest flight that I had ever been on and having a nine-month old certainly made it memorable. For 8 hours I was trying to keep him quiet and happy. Dan, Molly, Mary, John, Keira, Mollie and Hamish were all very keen to lend a hand which meant that Dan and I had a very pleasant flight indeed. Sherlock, Mycroft and Lestrade were all bent deep in conversation and didn't talk to anyone the whole flight over. Sally, Emily, Johnny and Sam weren't joining us as they had other plans but they would be flying out to join us in the final week in Florida.

New York was a busy city, bustling and teeming with life. It was also incredibly hot and humid. But we made the most of it. We went to Central Park, the 9/11 memorial, the Statue of Liberty (which Hamish, Amber and Phoebe took a great liking to). We had to explain what happened at 9/11 but I think they understood. We had dinner at some rather nice restaurants and went to some nice museums. Then we boarded the plane in New York and set off for two weeks in Florida. The flight took us almost 3 hours to make and if we thought the heat in New York was bad, it was worse in Florida.

We were staying on the Disney World park, which greatly annoyed Sherlock and Mycroft. 3 weeks away from their normal lives was beginning to get on their nerves. Sherlock was starting to become more vindictive and cruel towards people, particularly John. Only when he was in the company of his wife and son was he pleasant. Mycroft, the other hand, refused to leave the hotel once we had arrived, no matter how much Phoebe and Lestrade begged. He said that while the hotel was childish, it was more tolerable than outside.

The rest of us had a pleasant time. We wondered round the parks and went on a lot of rides. Hamish loved the Haunted Mansion ride so much that everyone was fed up with it by the end. Amber and Phoebe were just trying to find as many princesses as they could to show off to Claire when she came next week. Molly Hooper ended up being the bag holder as she couldn't go on the rides owing to being pregnant.

Sally, Sam, Johnny and Emily joined us for the final week. John and Mycroft picked them up from the airport. It was the first time I had seen Mycroft out the hotel all week. The minute Claire arrived, Phoebe and Amber were trying to show her all of their photos and wanted to take her to the park to meet Anna and Elsa and Ariel and Rapunzel.

That night, we sat outside and watched the fireworks over the castle. Hamish had Anthony, Amber, Phoebe and Claire were all busy discussing which Princess they wanted to meet next. Keira, Matthew, James and Mollie had gone off on a double date. Joseph was sat with Sherlock who was telling him how fireworks worked, Molly and Mary were sat keeping an eye on things, Lestrade and Mycroft were in their room and Sally, Johnny, Emily (Elijah asleep), Sam, Dan and I were all sat together.

"You know, I think the last time we were all together like this, without children was Leavers, at Sixth Form." Sally commented.

"Sally, you were 6 months pregnant!" Emily reminded her.

"Oh yeah," she smiled, "You know what I meant."

"Yeah." Said Johnny, "Abi was recovering from her brush with death, my twin sister was pregnant. Those were the 'normal times'."

"Johnny, we never had normal times!" I said, "I grew up with Sherlock, your dad was his best friend," I pointed at Emily "and your dad found him cases." I pointed at Sally and Johnny.

"Then our parents ended up getting together." Daniel added, looking at Sally and Johnny, "Which I never thought would happen!"

"Dan, I don't think anyone did!" I added.

"No, what I meant was, after mum died, I honestly thought that Dad was incapable of feeling anything for another woman."

"But he didn't." Sally commented, "He felt something for another man!"

We all fell about laughing.

"But seriously," said Emily, "Look how far we've come!"

"I know," said Sam, "Hardly seems possible!"

"It seems like we were kids 5 minutes ago!" Said Johnny.

"Imagine how our parents feel though!" Said Dan, "We were their babies once and now we have our own babies."

"Do you imagine," asked Sam, "That Anthony, Claire, Elijah and any other children we have, will be sat like this one day, with their children, talking in the same way?"

"Eeesh!" I squirmed, "I don't want to think about it!"

We all laughed again.

At that moment, Keira, Matthew, James and Mollie came back and Mycroft and Lestrade joined us, holding hands.

We all sat together and watched the final few fireworks. I let my hand slip into Dan's and I rested my head on his shoulder. After the fireworks, Mycroft got our attention.

"Greg and I have decided on a date for our upcoming wedding." He said, "Seeing as one of my daughters will be living over here next year, we have decided to get married in New York!"

Everyone was super excited but none more that Keira. For her, the fact that her dad had planned his wedding around her career was everything. She ran up to Mycroft and gave him the biggest hug ever. Then another miracle happened, he returned the hug.

Our time in America came to an end all too soon, but we had to get back for the start of school. It was nice to know that Lestrade and Mycroft had set a date and that Mycroft had considered his daughters career. Whether that was his idea or Lestrade's, I doubt we'll ever know. But it was nice to know that Mycroft Holmes was capable of humanity after all.


	10. September

**Chapter Ten- September**

I've always loved September. When I was a kid, it meant the start of a new term, which meant there were new things to learn, new theories to discover, new friends to make. There was a chance for new beginnings, to learn from the mistakes of last year and to grow and develop as a new person. However, this year for me, it meant another month staying at home, on maternity leave, whilst all of my friends went back to University to study and train. Don't get me wrong, I loved being at home with my son and husband but by now, I was starting to get a bit restless. The smallest things would set me off and my mood began to be withdraw and snappy. I was cold and distant with Anthony and even Daniel. I wouldn't sleep for days at a time. So in the end, Daniel made me an appointment with John, who had become my GP.

I was reluctant to go. I rarely left the house much these days and the prospect of leaving alone filled me with cold dread. I could easily get the train to John's surgery and so I headed out, with my headphones in and a thermos full of coffee. I got there in plenty of time for the next train and a short 5 minutes later, I was at the surgery.

As I sat in the waiting room, the panic started to rise. I had no idea what to say to John or even how to react. John was one of my oldest friends but he was also my doctor. I knew deep down that I could trust him, of course I did but I was so worried about everything that it didn't matter who I could or couldn't trust. I looked up at the screen and saw my name flash up. It told me the room number so I left and walked down the hall to John's office. The walk seemed to take forever but I think that was just because I was nervous.

John was sat at his computer when I pushed the door open. He looked up and gave me a warm smile as I sat down opposite him. For a while neither of us said anything. It wasn't awkward, it was a way for us to assimilate to the situation and then confront it.

"So," said John, after a while, "Dan phoned me and seemed to think that you may be suffering from postnatal depression."

I nodded.

"Abigail, for this to work, you are going to have to talk to me."

"Yes, John, that is what Dan thinks." I sighed.

"And what do you think?" he asked, writing on a pad.

"I honestly don't know anymore. I was fine in America and the weeks after we got back and then something changed."

"Dan said you've been feeling restless?" John asked, looking at me.

"Well, I suppose I have. Life with Sherlock meant I was always on my feet, always thinking about the next problem, the next solution. And now I'm on maternity leave, it seems the only problem I have to contend with is when Anthony wants feeding, or when he wants to sleep."

"Don't you enjoy being a mother?" he asked.

"I love it, John, I love it more than anything, but now, it's just become mind numbing, everyday the same now, there's nothing new to surprise me."

"Could Dan help with that?" John asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, and forgive me for being crude, but could he try being spontaneous once in a while. You know, sweep you off your feet?"

I blushed. "I don't know." I thought, "I suppose we could try. Everything has been about Anthony at the moment, we've kind of neglected us."

"Ok, so try that. Another thing you could try is getting out and about. Anthony is able to go swimming, so why not take him to lessons. Meet other parents. Stop isolating yourself at home. Meet up with Sally and Emily with the kids and bounce support and advice off each other. I think your problem Abigail, is that you have kept yourself at home since America. You've not seen anyone other than Dan and Anthony. So I'm telling you as your doctor and, more importantly as your friend, to get out there and have some fun!"

I smiled. It felt good. "Thanks John."

"Hey, that's what I'm for." He smiled, "Listen, Mary's throwing Amber a party for her 10th birthday. She needs some help. Bring Anthony to our place at two this afternoon and see if that helps."

"Cool!" I replied. "I'll pop over. Are you sure she won't mind?"

"Abi, she won't mind. You know Mary. Social butterfly if ever I saw one."

I laughed and thanked John. I was feeling much better. Maybe things didn't have to be so bleak. I had isolated myself at home too much and I needed to get out more. So I headed home with a spring in my step.

Once at home, I relayed to Dan everything that John had told me. He smiled and told me he could see a difference already. I told him about Mary and he jumped at the idea, so he ended up coming with me. We drove to John and Mary's. They lived in Watford which was on the other side of the city. Mary already knew I was coming. Anthony had fallen asleep on the way over so I put him down in the nursery and helped Mary to decorate the house. It was fun and we laughed and chatted all afternoon. Dan left just after 3 to pick Amber up from the village school and soon people started to arrive. Mrs Hudson, Sherlock, Molly (who was now 7 months pregnant!), Sherlock and Hamish were the first to arrive. I assumed they had all come together. Then Mycroft, Lestrade and Phoebe arrived, followed almost immediately by Emily, Johnny and Elijah. Sally, Sam and Claire were away in Middlesex visiting Sam's parents so they couldn't make it.

"Is Amber expecting any of this?" asked Emily, worried about her little sister.

"She knows I was planning something, but she doesn't know that all of you will be here!" said Mary smiling. "I just hope John isn't late!"

"He won't be," assured Emily, "He's an ex-army medic. If there is anything left from those days, it'll be his punctuality."

Mary smiled. Just then, John burst in through the door.

"Amber and Dan are coming down the street!" he panted.

"Quick!" cried Mary, "Hide!"

We all hid behind chairs, doors and walls.

"Uncle Dan, what's going on?" we heard Amber ask as the front door opened and closed.

"You'll see!" Dan said. Footsteps came down the hall and the living room door opened. Someone blew one of those party hooters and we all leapt up and yelled:

"SURPRISE!"

Amber looked shocked but then her face broke out into a huge smile.

"Happy Birthday, Amber!" said Mary, going to her daughter and hugging her tightly.

"Thanks Mum. I love you!"

"I love you too!"

John coughed, "And Dad?"

Amber looked at her Dad, "Oh, he's ok, I suppose!" John pulled a face. "Just kidding, I love him too!" And she gave him a big hug too.

"I love you too, Amber!"

We had a lovely afternoon and evening with the Watson's. Amber had a very special day and loved the attention. Even the Holmes' brothers were engaging in the party spirit and fun but then John Watson had a hold over Mycroft and Sherlock that no one could explain. John was right. A bit of social interaction, a bit of fun was just what I needed. I felt brighter and more energetic. I was going to treat each day as a new one, full of hope and positivity. Even though it was September, this was my new year's resolution; to be more positive, to devote my happiness and myself to my husband and son and to have fun and laugh. It was William Thackeray who said _"_ _A good laugh is sunshine in the house."_ And from that day on, the sun never set in our house.


	11. October

**Chapter Eleven- October**

October came quickly, bringing an East Wind, that was chilling to the bone. October meant 3 things. Firstly, Phoebe Lestrade turned ten. Secondly, it was Hallowe'en month. And thirdly, it meant that my little boy was almost one. Anthony was wanting to walk everywhere now which meant it took us 3 hours longer to do anything. But it was nice. It meant we spent more time together and that Anthony was growing up.

Phoebe Lestrade was turning 9 this year. This was completely daunting in the fact that it also meant that Jess Lestrade had passed away 5 years ago and Mycroft had been in a relationship with Lestrade for 3 and a half years now. It was scary how times had changed.

Anyway, onto Phoebe Lestrade's birthday. Still heavily into Disney, and the recent trip to Walt Disney World having fuelled that even further, Lestrade had persuaded Mycroft to agree to a Disney themed party. He had compromised by saying that it didn't necessarily have to be princess themed but along the lines of Disney. Lestrade had called on Sally, Emily, Claire, Amber and myself to help plan her party. Dan, Sherlock, Hamish and Molly had taken her to SeaWorld with Hamish for the morning so that we could decorate Mycroft's big (frankly gothic) house into a princess/Disney work of art! We had everything from Toy Story themed table cloths to Disney princess crockery. Mycroft walked in after work and sighed. But he kept his mouth shut. I don't think that even he was that brave. Everyone (who wasn't already there) started arriving from about four in the afternoon. This included the men (Johnny-who brought Elijah- and Sam) and Keira, Mollie, James and Matthew. There were also members of Lestrade's family who came down and Wanda and Timothy. They were keen to see Phoebe seeing as Mycroft was engaged to her father and they were keen to spend more time with Lestrade.

My grandmother was wonderful. She never judged or cared about her son's sexuality or relationships, she just took them all in her stride and loved each new person that she welcomed into her family. She already saw Greg as a son and that wouldn't change when he married Mycroft. John, Mary and Joseph arrived. They were the last. I phoned Dan and let them know they could come home. I then went and found Mycroft and told him to join the party. He came reluctantly. Anthony had woken up so I brought him down to. Immediately, he was taken off me by Wanda who relished any chance to see her grandson. Then, almost simultaneously, she embraced her eldest son into a hug. He looked alarmed and tried to fight her off. It was pointless. She just tightened her grip.

"Oh, Mike. Look at you." She said, pulling away.

"Mycroft is the name you gave me. If you could possibly struggle all the way to the end of it."

"Oh hush you!" she said. "Hello, Abi, dear."

"Hello, Grandma!" I said, giving her a hug.

"Mikey told me you've been having a tough time of it lately?"

I looked at Mycroft. "How did you know?"

"You are married to my son, who is also a government employee. You were distant and detached for a while in which we never saw you. The way you are looking at Anthony now suggests that you have recently re-established your maternal bond with him, meaning that you have been struggling with post-natal depression or something like that."

I opened my mouth and then closed it again, thinking. "Of course you knew." I said eventually.

Wanda was looking between myself and her son. "Now, Mikey…"

"Mycroft!" sighed Mycroft.

Wanda ignored him, "When am I going to meet your fianceé?"

I walked off, leaving them to it. I knew my son was in safe hands. Not long after this, Dan arrived, holding Hamish. I smiled and made my way over to him.

"Abi!" Hamish said, smiling, "Where's Anthony?"

I laughed. "With Grandma, you'll have to fight her!"

"I'll win!" he called back over his shoulder.

I kissed Dan, softly, "Hey!" I said.

"Hey. You ok?"

I nodded. "How was the aquarium?"

"Good. If you didn't mind Sherlock recounting the Merchant of Samara the whole way round."

I laughed, "Sounds like Sherlock!"

"Phoebe had a good time though!" he added, smiling, "They're just coming. Hamish was collecting sticks so they were having to stop every five minutes. I'd better let Dad and Greg know." And he went off to find them.

Soon after, Dad, Molly, Hamish and Phoebe came in. Much like Amber's birthday, we all shouted: "SURPRISE!"

But unlike Amber, Phoebe got quite emotional and Greg, Sally and Mycroft all ran over to her. After a bit of comforting she was alright and soon joined the party. I wandered over to Greg.

"Hey." I said, touching his uninjured shoulder.

"Hey." He replied, smiling. "You ok?"

I nodded, "What was that about?" I asked, "With Phoebe?"

"Oh. She was missing her mum." He looked sad for a moment. In all the time I had known Detective Inspector Lestrade, I had never seen him look like this. He was clearly still missing Jessica, even being with Mycroft. I never really knew the extent of Jess's death and its impact on Greg but I knew that Mycroft was there for him when none of us could have been. "Its been five years, she was four at the time..."

"Greg, something like this is going to take time to get over. Trust me, I know."

He smiled at me, "I know, Abi."

"Do you want me to talk to her?" I offered.

Greg's face lit up. "Would you mind?" he asked. "I can't seem to get through to her these days."

"She's a nine-old-girl, Greg, we're an enigma at that age!" I smiled, "But I'd be happy to do it."

He smiled and patted me on the back. "Thanks Abigail." And he left to find Mycroft.

The rest of the party was amazing. Dan and Johnny had sorted out some music and had turned one of Mycroft's reception rooms into a big disco and had lights and music going. Anthony stood on the edge of the dance floor, doing this weird kind of jig. It was so cute! Emily, Elijah and Johnny were all dancing and so were Claire, Sally and Sam. Even Mycroft and Greg had a little groove going. (Although, Greg's dancing was more Dad dancing than anything!) All in all, I think Phoebe had a great time and enjoyed celebrating her birthday. I planned to talk to her sometime after today, let her have a chance to be happy.

This all brings me to the next big thing in October- Hallowe'en. I hate Hallowe'en. Always have. It just seems like a poor excuse to dress up and scare the crap out of people. Maybe having Anthony would change my mind. Since my appointment with John, I was determined to go into everything with a positive mind. So, the end of October came and we started to get ready for Hallowe'en. Dan had suggested that we hold a party, seeing as the Watson's and Mycroft and Lestrade had all hosted one recently. I sighed and rolled my eyes but went along with it. Anyway, it gave me an excuse to talk to Phoebe Lestrade.

Hallowe'en morning happened to be a Saturday so I asked Phoebe to come over and give me a hand to decorate the house. Lestrade dropped her off, gave me a wink and mouthed 'Thanks, Abi!' before leaving. I let Phoebe in and shut the door.

"Thanks for coming to help, Phoebs." I said, making my way down to the kitchen.

"That's ok, Abi." She said, taking off her coat and following me, "I'm glad I could help."

"Would you like a drink?"

"No, I'm ok, thanks." She said, sitting down at the kitchen table. I got myself a cup of coffee and then sat opposite her.

"I had another reason for asking you over." I said, looking at her, softly. "Your dad asked me to talk to you."

"What about?" she asked, pulling at her sleeve.

"At your party, when you got upset. I asked what was up and he told me you were missing your mum?"

A tear fell down Phoebe's cheek and she looked down at her hands. She nodded.

"Oh, Phoebs, why didn't you tell anyone?"

She sniffed, "Because Dad seemed so happy with Mike and Sally had her life and so did Johnny."

"They still would have had time for you, they're family."

She shook her head. "Dad's always working, Mike's a hard guy to talk to about this kind of thing and I've always felt separate from Sally and Johnny because they're so much older than me."

"What about me? Or Dan? Or Mary? Phoebs there were so many people who would have helped you."

Tears were falling down her face. I moved round to the other side of the table and put my arm round her. "Oh sweetie." I said, rubbing her shoulders, "No-ones angry.

"I really miss Mum!" she sobbed into my shoulder.

"I know you do, sweetheart, I know you do." I rubbed her shoulder. "I missed my mum and dad so much and I wasn't like you. I had no one to talk to. No family, no real friends, no one who understood me. And I struggled. More than anything."

Phoebe sniffed, "I'd forgotten your parents died. I should have spoken to you sooner really."

"Phoebe, you spoke to me in your own time and when you were ready. As you go through life, there are going to be times when you want your mum there and unfortuantly, she won't be there. But you have me and Sally and Johnny and Sherlock, Molly, Mary, John, Mycroft and your Dad. You are not alone, kid."

She smiled a watery smile. "I know that now. And I think I will talk to Dad, not because I need it, but I think he needs it too."

I nodded, "I think that would be a brilliant idea, Phoebs."

Phoebe laughed a little, "What do you think Mum would make of Dad and Mike?"

I smiled, "Well, Jessica was a pretty accepting person. I think she is happy for them and is glad that Greg has moved on and has found love again. Which is all she would have wanted. She never caused anyone pain or misery, she just wanted everyone to be happy."

Phoebe smiled, "Sounds like mum."

There was a pause and I took a sip of coffee.

"Abi, do you think she's proud of me?"

I paused, not really knowing how to answer. "Yes. I think she is. I mean look at you!" She smiled, "You have grown up into a beautiful, talented, caring, sensitive young lady. I'm proud of you!"

Phoebe smiled, "Thanks Abi, and thank you for listening."

I put my hands in the air. "Hey, that's what I'm for!" I smiled, "Shoulder to cry on, punch-bag, human tissue, I've got it covered. And on a serious note, I wish that I had had someone there for me, after Karen and Anthony died. Greg did a good job but he was just doing his job as a police officer."

"He's a good egg, my dad, isn't he?"

I nodded, "There aren't many like him."

We sat in silence for a few minutes before Dan walked in.

"Hello, ladies. Shall we get this house spooked out?" he smiled.

I rolled my eyes. Phoebe laughed.

"What?" he asked.

"Never stop being you." I said, simply, standing up, kissing him and leaving the room.

We had a pleasant afternoon with Phoebe. We decorated the house in fake cobwebs and bunting. Dan put spooky decorations on the toilet and walls. I made up some camp beds in the spare room for the children and cleared the living room so that people could sleep in it. Anthony wandered around the house with a fake spider in his hand, laughing when Phoebe screamed and ran away. He didn't understand that he was scaring her, he just thought it was a fun game. The biggest mistake I made that day was letting Anthony help with the pumpkins. We ended up with pumpkin on the floor, on the walls, on Anthony and in his hair. Phoebe was no better and she was nine. But she was laughing and smiling away so I had no objections, it was a time to be fun and a time to laugh.

I quickly put the two of them in the bath and got the pumpkin out. Phoebe then got changed into her costume. Mycroft had reluctantly taken her to Sainsbury's to buy it and she had decided to go as Hermione Granger from 'Harry Potter'. I even sat and back-combed her hair so that it was frizzy. Anthony had a little pumpkin outfit- which looked adorable as he pottered around the house. I started to cook the food and put the nibbles on the table. The idea was to keep the party in the kitchen and the dining room as they were more than big enough. It was only a family party so it wouldn't be that big.

I had just put the punch and some crisps onto the table when the doorbell rang. It was Greg and Mycroft. Mycroft was wearing an old suit that had rips in it and Greg had wrapped bandages to make himself look like a mummy.

"Happy Hallowe'en!" said Greg, holding a bottle of wine and a bag of crisps in his good arm. Mycroft rolled his eyes. I smiled and let them in.

"How did you get on?" Greg asked in a lowered tone.

I nodded, "Very well. You have one happy Hermione Granger!" I replied as Phoebe came round the corner, being chased by Anthony and the fake spider again.

"Daddy!" she yelled, when she saw Lestrade standing in the doorway. She ran up and gave him a big hug.

"Hello, doodlebug!"

"You've nicknamed your daughter after a world war two flying bomb?" Mycroft asked incredulously.

Greg gave him a look and that silenced him.

"Greg, could you teach me that look? Might come in useful!"

Mycroft glared at me. I laughed. "Any other day, I would be terrified of you but not when your dressed like that!" and I walked off to find the fake spider and hide it.

People started arriving steadily. The costumes that people had made or brought were outstanding. Even Sherlock had made an effort- whether that was his choice or Molly's- I never found out. The evening was very enjoyable and I knew there would be thick heads in the morning but it was worth it. Like I said, October was one of my favourite months. But this November was going to be truly special!


	12. November

**Chapter Twelve- November.**

So this is it. We are approaching the end of my first year of Motherhood. The time has gone by ridiculously quickly. I've laughed, I've cried, I've hit rock bottom and then bounced back. And now my little boy was about to be one. But before I recount that, Dan and I turned 21 this November which was pretty special. We _had_ planned to celebrate it quietly, just the three of us, but with a family our size, that's quite hard.

I was awake early on the morning of the 17th of November, which was Dan's birthday. I took Anthony from the nursery and brought him downstairs. Then I arranged Dan's presents in a pile and made him some coffee and pancakes. By this point, Dan had woken up and wandered downstairs bleary eyed.

"Happy Birthday!" I smiled as he walked in.

"Dada!" said Anthony as he waddled over to his dad. Dan picked him up and smiled.

"Thanks, Abi." He said, giving me a quick kiss.

"21 years young today!" I said with a smile, "Can you believe its been a year already?"

"Not really. Werent you having a baby shower this time last year?" He asked.

I nodded, "And then we all drove down to Chichester. Any idea what people have planned this year?"

"I have no idea, which knowing our family, has made me worried."

"Well, let's not worry about that now. Let's just have a quiet morning here and take the day how it comes."

"I like that idea!" said Dan, smiling again, "What say you Anthony? Shall we have a quiet day at home with Mummy for Daddy's birthday?"

"Yeah!" he said, "Play now?"

We had a lovely morning at home, just the three of us. Dan had got some lovely presents. From Anthony, he had been giving some books on changing politics and a joke spy book. I had got him a pocket watch that had been engraved with a photo that I had taken of the three of us last year. Karen, Anthony, Jackie and Michael had sent down a food basket that had cakes and wine and biscuits and all manner of nice things in it. Harry, Zoe and Danny and some of the other that Dan worked with had clubbed together to get him a tankard that was engraved with '21' and underneath, 'Warning- badass Spook.' Emily and Johnny (who had gone away for a short break and so wouldn't be there for either of our birthday's) had sent Dan alcohol and some books. And that was all the presents I had got for Dan. We knew that our family was planning something and so there would be presents then.

Dan spent most of the morning playing with Anthony on the floor. It was a pleasant November day- a rarity for Britain. So we decided to go out for a walk to the local park. We put Anthony in his all in one raincoat and wellington boots and wrapped up warm. We had a lovely time at the park, we fed the ducks and played chase. Once we got home, we had some time together as Anthony fell asleep. Then we had dinner and before we knew it, the day was at an end.

"Do you want to go out for dinner tomorrow?" Daniel asked, as we lay in bed.

"That would be nice. So long as we agree its for both of our birthdays."

"I can live with that!" he replied, "Do you want to invite the family?"

"What, including Sally, Keira and Mollie?"

He nodded, "They are family."

I smiled, "That would be lovely." And I fell asleep in the arms of my husband.

I must have overslept because when I woke, Dan wasn't there and neither was Anthony when I checked the nursery. I wandered downstairs and found the two of them on the sofa. They were watching 'Paw Patrol' and playing with some bricks. Dan noticed that I was stood in the doorway and smiled at me.

"Happy birthday Abi!" he smiled. Anthony turned to see who he was talking to.

"Mama!" he said and he gave me the biggest smile ever. I went over to the sofa and picked him up.

"Hey, baby boy!" I said softly. "Did Daddy get you up this morning?"

He nodded, "We play bricks!"

"You played bricks?" he nodded again, "Well that was nice of Daddy, wasn't it?"

He nodded again. "I love my Daddy!"

Dan smiled, "Daddy loves you too." He paused, "What about mummy?"

"I love my mummy too." And he gave me a hug.

"Mummy loves Anthony."

"What about Daddy?" he asked.

"Mummy loves Daddy, lots and lots." And I kissed Anthony's forehead.

Dan smiled and put his arm around me, kissing the side of my head.

"Happy birthday, my darling." He said.

We had a lovely morning, just the three of us. I got some lovely gifts from my boys, including a beautiful necklace from Daniel that had our dates on it. (So our first date, the day we got engaged and our wedding day). From Anthony, I got some new clothes because my maternity ones were getting too big and I hadn't had the time to go out and get some new ones. He also got me some flowers which we put in the windowsill. From Anthony, Karen, Michael and Jackie, I got some lovely earrings and some money. From Elijah, Emily and Johnny, I got some books on midwifery (for when you start university again- said Emily!) and some money. And like Dan, the rest of the presents would come later.

We told everyone that we would meet them at the restaurant at around 3 in the afternoon. Dan had organised it all, even though it was a celebration of the two of us! As we walked into the side room that he had reserved, he had decorated the room with banners and balloons. The table had little '21' sequins all over it.

"Oh, Dan, this is incredible!" I gasped as I walked in. My eyes found the far corner. It was full of toys and balloons. "What's that?" I asked.

"That is a play corner. So that if the kids, and face it, there are a lot of them now, get bored, they don't have to sit around at the table, they can get down and they can play with whatever they want to."

I put Anthony down and he headed straight for the toys. "This is incredible!" and I kissed him softly.

"Oi!" said a voice from the door, "Get a room, you two!"

I pulled away and looked round. The voice belonged to one Keira Holmes. She was stood in the doorway with Matthew, Mollie and James.

I laughed, "You guys are no better!"

She smiled, "Touché!" and they came in. We exchanged hugs and kisses.

"So, 21 years young then?" asked Mollie, smiling.

"Something like that!" I smiled. "Sometimes I feel a lot older."

Just then, Sherlock, Molly and Hamish came in. Molly was huge now. She was due at the beginning of December.

"Molly, come and sit down!" said Dan, helping her to a chair.

She smiled. "I swear; I was smaller than this when I was expecting the twins!" she sighed.

"Each pregnancy is unique, Mum." I smiled, "Anyway, not long to go now!"

She smiled, "That's true."

"Happy Birthday, daughter." Said Sherlock, giving me a hug and handing me a card.

"Thank-you, Father!" I replied, smiling.

"Happy birthday, sister!" added Hamish. I ruffled his hair, affectionately. Sherlock shook hands with Dan and wished him a happy birthday as well.

Next to arrive was Mycroft, Greg and Phoebe. They were quickly followed by Sally, Sam and Claire. Sally's bump was beginning to show under her dress. (She had told us she was expecting again at the beginning of September). John, Mary, Amber and Joseph were the last to arrive.

"Sorry we're late!" said Mary, giving us kisses and cards and presents.

"Yeah, Amber couldn't decide what to wear!" joked John. Amber glared at her father and went to sit by Phoebe. Joseph toddled over to find Claire and Anthony in the toy corner.

"Don't worry!" Dan said, shaking John's hand. "You're not late and we're happy that you're here!"

After that, we all sat down and had a wonderful meal. Molly only had a small bit, not feeling all that hungry. We all chatted and laughed and ate far too much. At the end, Mycroft and Sherlock stood up. I slipped my hand into Dan's.

Mycroft began to speak, "21 years ago, I was blessed with the greatest gift of all. I was given a son. A lot has changed in those 21 years, but I couldn't be more proud of my son. He is a gentleman, more than I could ever be. He serves his country tactfully and with all the grace his job requires. He is devoted to his family and his wife. Daniel Holmes, congratulations on your 21st birthday. I am very proud of you and what's more, I have absolute faith that your mother would be too, if she could be here today."

I looked at Dan. His eyes were full of emotion and he just smiled at his Dad.

Sherlock was next. "Abi, I haven't known you as long as Mycroft has known Daniel. A series of unfortunate events brought us together and we built a family out of hurt and despair. I never imagined I could be a father and yet because of you, I have a family, that is ever growing. I think it's safe to say that we have changed each other's lives for the better. You have grown into a confident young woman, who I am so very proud of. You have your own family now, who love and support you. So, many happy returns on your 21st birthday, my darling daughter. Here's to the next 21!"

I smiled at Sherlock, wiping a tear from my cheek. That was it for Dan and I. Until next year!

The following week, Dan and I were planning for a very special day. Our boy would be one on the 27 of November and we wanted to do something special. I had put an order into Heidi's for a cake and we had begun to decorate the house. I had decided to phone my parents and invite them down to celebrate. Dan kept asking if I was ok with this and I kept reassuring him. I had to keep reassuring myself and keep reminding myself that they were his grandparents after all. It was right that they were involved in his life and I wanted to get to know my siblings.

Anthony's party was to be a quiet affair. Nothing like our birthday celebrations. I had invited Anthony, Karen, Jackie and Michael; Molly, Sherlock and Hamish; Mycroft, Greg and Phoebe and the twins. They were our immediate family and we just wanted a simple family affair. We were holding it in the afternoon so that we had the morning to be a family, the three of us.

The big day arrived and we both went to get Anthony when he woke up. We took him downstairs where a big pile of presents was waiting. We had got him some books, some toys and other bits and pieces. The main present from us was a tricycle that he could sit in and we could push along. He could then learn to ride a bike before we brought him a proper bike. He seemed to like his toys and was busy playing with them when the doorbell went. It was my parents and Jackie and Michael. I invited them in.

"This is Dan." I said, introducing him. Dan got up and shook Anthony's hand.

"Nice to meet you!" said Karen, giving him a hug.

"Likewise." Replied Dan politely. He still hadn't forgiven them for the wedding day episode.

"Dan, this is Jackie, my little sister, and this is Michael, my little brother."

Jackie smiled and waved, then went over to play with Anthony. Michael stayed close to his parents.

The rest of the morning passed quietly and without incident. Then everyone started to show up for the party. Karen helped me in the kitchen to sort out the food while Dan welcomed people.

"Thank you for asking us to come down." She said, brushing my shoulder.

I smiled. "I want us to get on. I want to forget about everything that happened. I want to be a family. But…"

"It's hard because you have a family here now, a life. I get that. I'm sorry for the way things turned out and I want to move on too."

I smiled again. "Thanks mum."

We started taking out the food bit by bit. Mum went and talked to Lestrade and Mycroft, surprised to learn that they were engaged now. Dan was talking to Molly who had made her home on the sofa with her feet up. She would be asleep by the end of the afternoon. Everyone was very amicable which I was very surprised about – given that both my sets of parents were there and knowing Sherlock I was expecting world war three.

At around four in the afternoon we did the birthday cake. It was a pale blue with a pirate ship on it. We all sang happy birthday and Dan and I blew out the candles. Then everyone went home.

Dan and I bathed Anthony and put him to bed. He was a very tired little boy. We stood and watched him sleep for a while. The past year had gone so quickly. If someone told me a year ago that I would be a mother and a wife, I would have told them they were mad. The days of messing around and being carefree had gone but I wouldn't change it for the world. I was happy, so very happy and I couldn't wait to see what life had in store for me next.

THE END

 **A/N**

 **For those who have stuck with this story to the very end, this chapter is for you. This has been a fun project to do and has made me laugh, cry and fall to pieces. It's taken a while but we're here. The end of the line...**

 **Abi's story isn't over yet, so please, stay tuned!**


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